


Impossible

by Green_Eyed_Dragon_Fanfiction



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-16
Updated: 2017-11-13
Packaged: 2019-01-18 10:37:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 11
Words: 31,864
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12386469
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Green_Eyed_Dragon_Fanfiction/pseuds/Green_Eyed_Dragon_Fanfiction
Summary: Reader and Bucky are arch nemeses by night, best friends by day, and neither one knows the truth about the other’s double life.





	1. Chapter 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: ‘I’m a superhero and you’re my arch nemesis but we don’t know each other’s identities and we’re actually best friends’
> 
> You’re best friends with Bucky, although you know him as James Ranier. He’s your best friend, too, but he has no idea you’re actually Shade, the woman who plagues the reformed Winter Soldier’s life as his arch nemesis.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female!Mutant!Reader
> 
> Warnings: Violence, Swearing (always), explosions
> 
> A/N: I’m looking forward toying with the whole “wars are only fought if two sides believe they’re in the right “ idea. I think it makes for interesting antagonists.
> 
> This chapter was inspired by Look What You Made Me Do by Taylor Swift

## 

“You’ve lost this round, Soldier,” you said as you grinned at him from behind your mask as you sat at your desk. You rested your head on your interlaced fingers, your arms propped up on your mounds of paperwork. 

“I can still kill you,” he said, advancing on you quickly. His feet ate up the distance between you in mere seconds. His metal hand reached out and grabbed your arm, fingers gripping you so hard you knew there’d be bruises. He yanked you out of your chair and pulled you up and over the desk. 

You laughed at him even as your face twisted in pain. “You can kill me, Soldier, but then you’d never find the bombs in time,” you said, tilting your head as a wicked smirk that he couldn’t see graced your lips. “Either you save New York and all of its inhabitants or you kill me,” you said, reaching up to caress his mask slowly with your fingertips. 

His eyes locked onto yours, searching for truth in them. After a moment he let out a frustrated groan and released you, throwing you back onto your desk. 

“Where are the bombs, Shade?” he roared, metal fingers reaching out as fast as lightning, clasping around your neck. The pressure was enough to be uncomfortable, but he wasn’t hurting you. Yet. 

“Don’t be so hasty,” you said, eyes narrowing at him. “You have an option, Soldier. If you kill me here you and your friends will never find the bombs before they explode. If you want to save New York, I suggest you release me,” you spat, glaring at him. Inside, you were terrified, but you wouldn’t let that show in front of your arch nemesis. 

He glared at you, gaze roving up and down your body before he growled and released you in a huff. He took a step back but pulled a knife out and leveled it at you. You merely winked at the implied threat. 

“Tell me where the bombs are hidden, Shade,” he roared, obviously fighting the urge to rip you limb from limb. 

“I’m glad you’re not completely impossible to reason with,” you said amicably, grinning widely as though you were discussing good places to grab a bite to eat. 

“Stop playing games!” he yelled, closing in on your personal space in the blink of an eye, glaring daggers down at you. 

You sighed, rolling your eyes at his antics. “No need for the theatrics. I don’t want to kill anyone,” you said, reaching behind yourself to grab a USB drive from your desk. 

“Here, the location of the bombs,” you said, holding the USB out to him. “I trust you know how to use this?” you asked, smirk evident in your tone. 

He snatched it from your grasp, glaring at you. “What the hell is your angle, Shade?” he asked, eyeing the USB suspiciously. 

“I thought that information would be the only thing to get you off my ass. Do you want the USB or not?” you asked, crossing your arms as you leveled a challenging glare at him. 

“You’re coming with me,” he said, metal arm reaching out to grab you. His metal fingers dug into your skin, causing you to hiss in pain. 

“I’ll give you three seconds to let go of me,” you spat. You tried to wrench yourself from his grasp, digging your heels into your office’s lush cream rug as you attempted to hold your ground against his immense strength.

“Not gonna happen, Shade. You have too much to answer for,” he said, dragging you forward by the arm.

“Let me go, Soldier. Or people will die,” you hissed, glaring at him as you threw a few punches at his arm. 

“Not gonna happen, Shade,” he growled, yanking you towards the door.

 _“Do it, Shade. Or **he** dies,” _ came a voice from the communication device in your ear. 

“Let go, Soldier. Now!” you demanded, tugging hard enough to bring him to a stop. 

“I said ‘no,’ Shade,” he said, venom clear in his voice. He didn’t even turn to look at you as he marched onward towards the elevators. His mistake.

“This is on you, then. I didn’t want to do this,” you whispered. He barely had time to process your words before you reached into your jacket’s pocket and pressed the button on the detonator you had stashed there. 

[Originally posted by tvdads](https://tmblr.co/ZHQkMv1jQnK6o)

The vibrations rocked even the building you were standing in. The Soldier dropped your arm as he ran to the huge floor-to-ceiling windows and stared at the city beneath him. Crimson flames dotted the city, lighting up the skyline in a macabre red-and-orange painting. 

By the time he turned around to apprehend you, you were gone. 

* * *

You stared at the carnage around you, multiple buildings up in flames as sirens from rescue vehicles blared around you. You took one last look at the building you’d been in moments ago.

“Look what you made me do,” you sighed before you turned on your heel and ran as fast as you could away from the Winter Soldier.

 

* * *

[Originally posted by sithlordalice](https://tmblr.co/ZHE9mh2ImEstQ)

You stirred in your chair at the sound of the hospital room’s door opening. You blinked blearily at your surroundings for a moment before your vision focused. Your gaze drifted from your unconscious twin’s form to the person standing in the doorway.

“James! I wasn’t expecting you,” you mumbled, smiling as you rubbed the sleep from your eyes. 

He opened the door just wide enough to walk in, then shut it behind himself quietly. His long dark brown hair was tied up in a bun, showing off his scruff-covered chiseled jawline. He was wearing a black sweatshirt over a white t-shirt accompanied by baggy black sweatpants. A soft, worn, brown leather jacket protected him from the worst of the chill outside.

“Sorry for the unannounced visit. I was worried about you and Gabe after what happened last night, and you weren’t answering your phone,” he said, moving to the bedside table. He removed the old, dying flowers from the vase on the table and replaced them with blood red roses; Gabe’s favorite. 

“Don’t worry about it, James. And sorry for not messaging you. I left to check on Gabe after the explosions happened and didn’t remember my phone charger,” you said, apologetic. 

He chuckled softly as he placed the old flowers into the room’s tiny trash bin. “It’s alright, (Y/N). I’m just glad you and Gabe are okay,” he said as he walked over to the empty chair beside you. He sat down beside you with a huff, his body sagging in exhaustion. 

“Rough night?” you asked, raising an eyebrow at him. 

He let out a pained sigh. “Like you wouldn’t believe,” he said as he looked over at you with a commiserative expression. 

“Well, that makes two of us,” you said, smiling at him fondly. 

“I’ll bet,” he agreed. “The attacks didn’t effect the hospital at all?” he asked, glancing at Gabe. 

“No, apparently the explosions were all on unpopulated zones. Apparently the only casualty was a stray dog who happened to be passing by the wrong place at the wrong time. Pretty lucky, huh?” you asked lightheartedly, nudging his arm with your elbow. 

Instead of answering he seemed to stare off into space, staring past where your brother laid on the hospital bed. You let him think for a few minutes but you quickly grew concerned. “James?” you asked quietly, placing a hand gently on his arm. 

He jumped as he snapped out of his reverie, gaze fixing itself back onto you. “What? Sorry,” he said, obviously caught off guard.

“I was just saying… it’s lucky that no one was hurt, yeah?” you asked, raising an eyebrow at him as you studied his features.

He seemed to relax, sinking back into his chair. “Yeah, lucky,” he agreed, his tone surprisingly severe. 

“You alright?” you asked, gaze roving up and down his body as though another assessment would let you in on whatever was plaguing him. 

“Yeah, of course, Doll,” he reassured you, giving you a winning smile. “You feel like it’s safe enough to leave? That movie you wanted to see is coming out soon and-”

“You got tickets, didn’t you?” you asked, a broad grin sneaking its way onto your face. 

He grinned mischievously back at you, pulling two tickets out of his pocket. “’Course I did,” he said cockily, flashing them at you. 

You snatched them from his grasp and he grumbled his displeasure as you eyed the information on the tickets. 

“Alright, whose balls did you have to fondle for these?” you said, holding them out for him to take back as you leveled him with a questioning stare.

“No one’s, thank you very much,” he said, rolling his eyes at you as he snatched them back and placed them safely back into his coat pocket. 

“I don’t believe you,” you said, laughing at his scandalized expression. 

“I guess you don’t want to go to the sneak peak showing with me, then?” he asked, eyebrows raised in challenge. 

“Alright, Sass Lord. No need to go that far,” you pouted. 

“Sass Lord? Ah, you wound me,” he said, voice laced with mock hurt. 

You snorted, hitting him lightly on the arm. “Shut up, James,” you said, laughing. 

He bit his lips, closing them securely into a tight line between his teeth, and stared down at you mischievously. 

You groaned, rolling your eyes at his antics. “I didn’t mean literally, jerk!” you said, hands flying to either side of his face. You attempted to squish his face until he relented- let his lips go, and spoke- but he was stubborn. You couldn’t help but laugh at the ridiculous expressions you were contorting his face into. He fought back a smile as you struggled, eventually relenting with a hearty laugh. You swore the sound was magical. You didn’t normally get close to other people, but in moments like this you knew exactly why James had worked his way into your life. 

“Alright, alright. Stop it before you mess my face up permanently,” he said, grabbing your hands. Even through his gloves his touch was electric and you stared up at him, thunderstruck. Time seemed to stop as you looked into his eyes. 

The moment was over faster than you wanted it to be. He dropped your hands unceremoniously, standing suddenly, posture stiffer than you’d ever seen it. You let the disappointed frown slide off your face as he turned to look at you. 

“Ready to go?” he asked, hand extended to help you up. You pointedly ignored it, hopping up from the chair maybe a little too enthusiastically. His gaze fell for a split second before his fingers curled into a fist and he shoved his hand into his pocket. He coached his expression back into a smile. “I’ll wait outside while you say goodbye,” he said, inclining his head towards Gabe as he made his way towards the door.

“Alright, I’ll be out in a minute,” you assured him, moving to Gabe’s side as James stepped out of the sterile white hospital room, shutting the door behind him. 

You brushed some of Gabe’s hair out of his face, the (Y/H/C) locks a long, tangled mess on top of his head. You gazed at your twin’s face, sighing, anxiety lacing your veins. Throughout all the years the two of you had been alive you’d been careful. While the both of you were immune to the effects of aging, you weren’t invincible. You didn’t regenerate rapidly… you just lived a very, very long time. 

[Originally posted by fourteenyearswithpain](https://tmblr.co/ZjaIsk1ljCXIA)

Then the accident had happened and Gabe, your Gabriel, had been taken hostage. The organization that hurt him used him as leverage against you. They’d given you an ultimatum. Serve them without question or they’d kill him in cold blood.

It had been an easy choice for you. 

Still, you tried to outmaneuver them whenever you could, saving people whenever and wherever you could. It worked sometimes, but your heart had long grown hard to the casualties you’d inflicted over the years. 

Everything for your Gabriel. Anything to keep him safe. 

You placed a kiss on his forehead, willing him to wake up. He could spend eternity wasting away in this hospital, and you’d wait an eternity just for the slim chance you’d see him open his eyes again. 

“I’ll be back in a few days, Gabe,” you said, running a hand over his cheek. “You better be awake by the time I get back,” you threatened, all animosity absent. “I love you,” you whispered, fingertips lightly grazing his cheek as you turned and headed towards the door, exiting as quietly as you could. 

James stood on the other side of the hall, across from Gabe’s room, leaning against the light blue hallway as he waited for you. He pushed off of the wall with a casual grace as you emerged from Gabe’s room and the two of you fell into step as you made your way towards the elevators. 

“We have two hours, right?” you asked, turning to face him as you pressed the button to call the elevator. 

“Yup. How d’ya wanna kill time?” he asked. The elevator dinged, the doors opened, and a few people exited. He held his arm across the door to keep it open as they left and you entered, only joining you once you safely made it onto the elevator. You were so used to his gentlemanly manner you didn’t even think about the “thank you” you mumbled to him as your mind wandered.

You thought about his question for a moment, gaze absently wandering up towards the ceiling as your thoughts drifted.

“I need to get changed. I grabbed whatever I could to get here when the explosions started, but I’ve just now realized that I’m mildly disgusting… These are definitely old workout clothes,” you said, nose crinkling with repulsion as you took a whiff of your shirt. 

The look on your face earned a smile and single breathy chuckle from James, his eyes twinkling with amusement. “To your place, then?” he asked as the elevator made its slow descent down two floors to the lobby.

“Definitely. We can stop for lunch on the way to the theater. I’m starving,” you said as you stepped out of the elevator once the doors opened to the lobby. James trailed after. Your stomach rumbled, emphasizing your statement. 

James laughed as he held the door open for you, flagging down a taxi with practiced New Yorker ease. “Maybe food first?” he asked as he opened the door for you. You slid in and he followed suit. You groaned as your stomach betrayed you once again, filling the cab with a loud growl. 

“No, definitely shower. I’ll grab a snack to hold me over, though,” you said, grimacing. You gave the driver your address before returning your attention to James.

“Alright, if you insist,” James said, an amused grin painting his features. He was staring at you nonchalantly from his seat next to you. You felt your cheeks heat under his gaze and you turned your head to stare out the window, unwilling to look at him. 

You glanced at him out of the corner of your eyes a few times as the taxi wove its way through the city streets. The first few times he was still staring at you, but the last few times he had his phone out, tapping away at the screen, brows slightly furrowed. You thought about asking him if something was wrong, but he caught you staring and quickly put his phone away, giving you a winning smile. You decided it wasn’t anything of importance and felt the corner of your lips twitch up into a smile as you looked at him. 

He was your best friend. He’d tell you if something was wrong.

* * *

An hour and a half later you were on the way to the theater in your car, a beautiful dark purple 1970 Dodge Challenger. The 70′s wasn’t your favorite era, but damn if it didn’t produce some beautiful cars.  

“You have to let me drive this some day,” James said from the passenger seat, rubbing the dash affectionately. 

You snorted. “In your dreams,” you said, pulling into the swanky movie theater’s parking lot. According to James it was one of the ones where they had huge chairs and served real food while you watched. It even had alcohol to boot. You thought about letting him drive back if it meant you’d be able to have a few drinks. 

“Come on, (Y/N). I’m a great driver,” he protested. You glanced at him and did a double take. He was staring at you. His eyes were so wide and his hands were clasped together as he gazed at you through his lashes. “Please?” he pleaded, literally batting his eyelashes at you. 

You groaned and stepped out of the car. He followed suit, crossed his arms on top of the hood, then placed his head on top of his arms. He stared at you with his big blue-grey eyes and you felt yourself cave. 

“Fine,” you said, slamming your door a little harder than you meant to. He gave a single victory cheer, beaming at you. He patted the hood lovingly as he shut the door, following you as you made your way towards the theater. “But only if you buy me a drink from the bar,” you said, smirking over your shoulder at him as he jogged to catch up to you. 

“Deal,” he said, grinning. 

He arrived a half second before you, opening the door for you to enter. You smiled at him, a small “thank you” leaving your lips as you took in the madhouse that was the inside of the theater. There were more people than you were expecting and you instinctively reached out for James. His hand found yours and you felt a flush rise from your neck to your cheeks. If anyone saw you they’d definitely think you were a couple out on a date. His hand was warm and soft in yours. You couldn’t look at him- you were so embarrassed at how much you were enjoying this that you thought you’d die if you looked at him just then. Being single for as long as you’d been seemed to have crossed a few wires in your brain, and simple things like holding hands sent your heart all aflutter. 

“Well, the seats are pre-booked and they serve you inside the theater so we can order everything once we sit down,” he said, pulling the tickets out of his pocket. 

“Alcohol too?” you asked, impressed. 

He chuckled at you. “Yeah, alcohol, too,” he said, weaving his way towards the usher. James handed them over and the usher directed you to a theater to your left. 

“Hang on, bathroom first. Don’t want to miss any of the movie,” you said, reluctantly dropping his hand to enter the ladies’ room. You glanced back at him and if you didn’t know any better it seemed like he was disappointed by the sudden loss of contact, too. You assumed it was your dumb brain seeing what it wanted to and pushed the thought from your mind. You hadn’t made it more than three steps into the bathroom when your phone rang. 

It was your other phone. The one _they_ called you on when they had a mission for you. You yanked it out of your purse quickly, entering a stall, and locked the door behind you. You pressed the accept call button and mashed the phone to your ear, apprehensive. 

“Mission for you, Shade. High value target. Data waiting at the usual drop point. I don’t think we need to tell you what will happen if you fail or make us wait,” the voice on the other line said. You gritted your teeth at the thinly veiled threat. 

“Understood,” was your only reply. The line went dead and you shoved the phone back into your purse, cursing. This was too soon after the last one. They were working you harder and harder by the day.

You unlocked the door, washing your hands for the purpose of appearances and took a deep breath. You hated lying to James, but it was all to keep him safe… to keep him away from your double life. He might understand if he knew you were protecting your brother, but you couldn’t risk his or your brother’s life on the assumption he _might_ understand. 

_Show time,_ You thought to yourself.

You ran out of the bathroom, eyes wide. They locked onto James, who was immediately on alert upon seeing the look on your face. You ran to him, hands clutching at his arms. “James, I’m sorry- I have to go-” you sputtered, chest heaving for added effect. “My mom called, Dad’s having trouble- I have to go-” you rambled, not pausing to let James get a word in edgewise. “Please keep an eye on Gabe while I’m gone!” you pleaded as you ran to the door, leaving him a confused mess in your wake. 

 

**Bucky’s POV**

Bucky tried to think of a time you mentioned your parents before, and failed. Never in the time he’d known you had you talked about them. They never visited Gabe or you. He’d honestly assumed they weren’t part of your life anymore, but he wasn’t going to bring it up unless you did first. 

He watched as you disappeared through the double doors and sighed as he pulled out his phone. He sent you a quick text;

_If you need anything, let me know. I hope everything works out alright. -J_

He tapped out the message and pressed send. He let out a deep sigh, deciding to wait to see the movie with you at a later date. He exited the movie theater and called a cab to come pick him up. 

He was halfway back to the compound when Steve called on his work phone. He didn’t know why, but he knew he wouldn’t like what his best friend had to say. “What, Steve?” he asked, covering the speaker as he told the taxi driver he’d pay him double if he hurried up. 

“It’s Shade. She and her goons have been spotted in the city. How fast can you be ready?” Steve asked, his usual friendly tone replaced by his no-nonsense Captain America persona. 

“I’ll be at the compound in ten,” Bucky said. The taxi driver glanced at him, incredulous, and raised his eyebrows. Bucky motioned at the the road with his head, holding up two crisp hundred dollar bills. The driver nodded eagerly and stepped down hard on the gas petal. 

“Make it five,” Steve said, ending the call abruptly. Bucky glared at the screen.

“Hell, Shade. What are you up to this time?” he murmured, sitting back as the taxi roared down the highway.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: ‘I’m a superhero and you’re my arch nemesis but we don’t know each other’s identities and we’re actually best friends’
> 
> You’re best friends with Bucky, although you know him as James Ranier. He’s your best friend, too, but he has no idea you’re actually Shade, a woman who plagues the reformed Winter Soldier’s life as his arch nemesis.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female!Mutant!Reader
> 
> Warnings: Violence, Swearing (always)
> 
> A/N: Here’s part two, lovelies.
> 
> This Chapter has been inspired by Sabotage by The Beastie Boys

[Originally posted by xiadz](https://tmblr.co/ZOGrMk2MBZw5S)

**Your POV**

“How the hell did they find us so quickly?” you hissed, maneuvering through the city’s streets with surprising ease. It was dark by now, the city a little less busy, but you still had to keep a laser focus on the road. “You-” you barked, glaring at the agent in your passenger seat, “-cover fire, now,” you said, rolling down the window. He immediately leaned awkwardly out of the mustang’s window and took careful aim at your pursuers.

The Winter Soldier and Captain America had already taken out two of the SUVs that had made up your armed escort. By the looks of it they were taking out the last one. You glared at the SUV behind you as it swerved dangerously then miraculously steadied itself, gaining quickly. You could just barely make out the red, white, and blue man himself in the driver’s seat.

You glanced over your shoulder at the man you’d kidnapped not ten minutes ago. One of Shadow’s agents had a gun to the man’s side, his face impassive as events unfolded around him. The hostage, however, looked like he was going to piss himself at any second.

“Alright everyone, if we stay calm we’ll get out of this alive. Probably,” you said, false bravado tricking yourself into feeling more confident than you should have. 

“They’re gaining,” shouted the agent with his torso out the window. He yelled in pain a moment later, quickly retreating back inside of the car. He’d been shot in the arm, but managed to hold onto his gun. 

“Pathetic,” you murmured, pulling a pistol out of your thigh holster. You rolled down your window and took a sharp turn, giving yourself the angle you needed to get a clear shot at the SUV that the Soldier and Captain had hijacked from your men. It felt like you were moving in slow motion as you took aim at their tires and shot out the front two with two well-aimed bullets.

[Originally posted by weaponslover](https://tmblr.co/ZTtF3r1hNsD4X)

The mustang disappeared around the turn and you drove a few more blocks before you pulled into a parking garage. 

“You. Drive. I’ll hold them off. Get the payload out of here,” you barked, the orders slightly muffled by your mask. You hopped out of the sleek mustang, pausing to grab more weapons from the trunk. 

“This wasn’t part of the plan,” said the stone-faced agent through the window. 

“Yeah, well, the plan went to shit. You don’t have a chance of escaping unless I can hold them off,” you said, slamming the trunk. “Unless you want to fail your mission?” you asked, raising an eyebrow at him. “If the Avengers don’t kill you, Shadow will,” you seethed. 

If you failed, they’d kill Gabe. You couldn’t allow that.

“Understood. Don’t fail, Shade,” the agent said as you hopped into the passenger seat. You grunted your dismissal of his comment. Of course you wouldn’t fail. 

“Back out to the street. They’ll be looking for the car,” you said as the wounded agent kicked the mustang back on and sped out of the parking garage. “Have to get their attention or they’ll just tail you,” you said as the cement walls of the parking garage gave way to the city streets. 

It only took you a second to spot them. “There. Go the other way, as far from them as you can get,” you said, then stepped gracefully out of the car and slammed the door behind you. It sped off not a moment later, tires screeching in the night. 

They jogged your direction. Even at this distance you could see two sets of bright blue eyes trained on you with a laser focus. 

“Fuck, this is going to hurt,” you grimaced as you pulled your guns from your holsters. Twin pistols. If you were lucky you’d get a shot or two on them before they got close. It would slow them down, make it a little easier to fight them in close range. You hoped the SUV crash had done some damage, too.

They spotted the guns before you’d even raised them. They ducked behind parked cars, but you wouldn’t wait until they got to you. You ran onto the sidewalk, surprising the Captain with a few ace shots. Only his enhanced reflexes and shield kept him from becoming patriotic emmental cheese. You felt his presence rather than saw him, swiveling just in time to dodge a punch. His metal fist flew through the space your head had just been. You danced away as they advanced. You emptied the cartridges in your pistols, only getting a graze on the Captain’s arm. 

It wasn’t long before they forced a close-up fight. You pulled out your knives, the metal glinting a sinister green, purple, and blue in the dim city lights. 

“Let’s dance, boys,” you said, praying to whatever god who would listen that you’d come out of this fight alive. 

* * *

It wasn’t long until you were disarmed, your knives clattering to the ground in the darkness. That left you with only your fists. 

They never saw you coming. 

You trained for hundreds of years, mastering every martial art you could find. 

The Captain and the Soldier were exceptional fighters. They hit harder, were well-trained, and worked together flawlessly.

You made them look like novices. You knew this wouldn’t work again. They’d be ready for you next time, but you used every advantage you could get. You knew they were tired. From fighting all your men, from the crash, from the cuts and bullet grazes. All of it had weakened them. You hit them where they were weakest, wore them down until, at last, they both dropped. You nearly dropped with them, body weak from exhaustion. You just didn’t have the enhanced stamina they did. You honed it after years of training, but you simply couldn’t match them. If they’d been at their best you definitely would have lost.

“Till next time, boys,” you whispered as you limped numbly away from them. You succeeded. The Shadow agents got away. Gabe was safe.

* * *

“Yeah, James. I’m fine. My dad’s fine, too. I’ll be back in a few days,” you said, grateful he couldn’t see how fondly you were smiling at his fussing.

“Are you sure? You don’t need anything?” he asked, voice laced with obvious worry. 

“I don’t need anything. I’m sure. Dad’ll get out tomorrow and I’m just staying until I know they’ll be okay without me. I’ll be back in town soon, I promise,” you said, smiling broadly. 

“Alright, Doll. We’ll see that movie when you get back, yeah?” he asked. You could hear the hopeful smile in his voice. 

“Yeah, James. It’s a date,” you said, balking a half second later at your choice of words. He was silent on the other end of the line and you sputtered, fumbling for an excuse. Coming up with none, you did the only thing you could think of. “Uh, I’lltalktoyoulaterbyeJames,” you said in a rush, pressing the end call button before he could respond. Your chest was heaving, adrenaline from your panic coursing through your veins. 

You could take on Captain America and the Winter Soldier, but your best friend who, if you were being honest with yourself, you had a crush on? Nope. Not happening. Give you Cap and the Soldier any day; they were much easier to deal with. Emotions? Not so much.

You sighed as you looked around the nearly empty apartment. Your “parents.” Yeah, chalk that up to another lie you had to tell James. They’d died so long ago you barely remembered the date or what they’d looked like. You were hiding from the Avengers in a Shadow safe house. You’d stay long enough to recover from your fight and heal the worst of the bruises and cuts so that people wouldn’t be suspicious. 

Your phone buzzed, likely messages from James, but you ignored it, and flopped down on the bed in an unsightly heap. You’d showered since your mission but you were sore as hell, body completely spent from your fight. You barely had the energy to feed yourself. The next few days were gonna suck.

* * *

**Bucky’s POV**

He stared at the laptop screen in front of him as he set his phone down, your voice still ringing in his ear. 

When he first met you he’d done a background check. Rather, FRIDAY had. You were squeaky clean and he’d trusted the intel, becoming fast friends with you. He’d been relieved when you’d come up clean. He’d clicked with you instantly. There was something in your eyes that he didn’t see in anyone but himself and Steve. A timeless sort of knowledge behind them… or maybe another time-lost soul?

He’d told you a fake name and you’d bought it. James Ranier and (Y/N) (Y/L/N) became fast friends, surprising Steve and the rest of the team. Bucky had trouble talking to most people but that was never the case with you. When he was around you he almost felt like his old self. 

Which is why, when he searched more deeply into your background and found nothing he was distraught. He found _nothing_. Literally. You didn’t exist, according to his research. At least, not under that name. He ran facial recognition and that came up with nothing. You were a ghost. 

He stared at the phone in his hand, brows furrowed in confusion.

“Who are you?” he whispered, glaring at the report on the screen.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: ‘I’m a superhero and you’re my arch nemesis but we don’t know each other’s identities and we’re actually best friends’
> 
> You’re best friends with Bucky, although you know him as James Ranier. He’s your best friend, too, but he has no idea you’re actually Shade, a woman who plagues the reformed Winter Soldier’s life as his arch nemesis. James begins to suspect you may be more than you appear.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female!Mutant!Reader
> 
> Warnings: Violence, Swearing (always)
> 
> A/N: Enjoy, sweethearts!
> 
> This Chapter was inspired by When You Were Young by The Killers.

##   

[Originally posted by caps-bucky](https://tmblr.co/Z7lbSr2BSbgI0)

**Your POV**

“That was everything I wanted it to be,” you gushed as you and James exited the theater. 

“What was your favorite part?” James asked, smiling at your excitement.

“Oh, gosh. I don’t know. Maybe the part with the car chase? They filmed it so well it was like I was there! Or maybe it was-” your voice died when you saw the look he was giving you. You felt heat creep into your cheeks and glanced away. “What?” you asked quietly as you headed to your car. 

“Nothing, Doll,” he said fondly. You looked up at him. Something was off, but you couldn’t quite place it. Then you remembered. 

“You want to drive, don’t you?” you asked, throwing him a knowing smirk. 

He studied your face solemnly instead of answering and you thought you’d gotten it wrong, shifting uncomfortably under his gaze. Then he smiled and you relaxed.

“Yeah. You promised I could,” he said, nudging your shoulder playfully with his. 

“I think I was promised alcohol,” you said as you pulled your keys out of your purse. You held them in front of his face tauntingly. He made a grab for them and you pulled them away from his grasp. 

He pouted for a second. “We can go back to your place and split a six pack,” he conceded and you smiled. 

“I’m glad you’re not completely impossible to reason with,” you teased, tossing him the keys as you turned and walked towards the passenger side. You heard them clang to the ground and you stopped walking, exasperated. “C’mon, dude. I thought you wanted to drive?” you asked, turning around. “And then you go and drop my keys,” you said, finally looking at him.

He was frozen, staring at you in shock.

“Hello? Earth to James,” you said, waving a hand in front of his face. He seemed to snap back into himself, but he was still eyeing you with apprehension. “Alright, I know trusting you with my baby is a big step, but you can stop freaking out now,” you said as you bent down and picked your keys up with a huff. “Last chance. Do you wanna drive back to my place or not?” you asked, holding the keys out to him.

“Yeah,” he said absently as he took the keys from you. He looked away from you, brows furrowed in confusion, as he unlocked the doors. He kept throwing glances your way. 

“You should take a picture. It’ll last longer,” you said, smirking at him as you got in the passenger side. 

He drove the entire way to the freeway without saying a word and the silence made your skin crawl. Did you do something to make him angry at you? You’d had a great time; he’d even gracefully let your slip up on the phone slide earlier, not mentioning it at all. You’d been grateful he wasn’t trying to pressure you, but now you didn’t know what was wrong. 

When he passed by the exit to your house you were suddenly very concerned. 

“James, you missed the exit,” you said quietly, studying his face, apprehensive smile on your lips.

“I know,” he said quietly, his face neutral. It was something about the way he was tense but carefully expressionless that put you on high alert. 

“You know?” you asked quizzically, trying to maintain your naive, normal-person attitude. 

“I thought you might wanna see where I work,” he said, finally turning to smile at you. Something about it was off. It didn’t reach his eyes. Your mind reeled as you tried to figure out what was wrong. There was no way he found out about your time as Shade. You were too careful and James wasn’t a part of that world. That only left the date.

“Look, if this is about the- about me calling today a date, I-” you began, stumbling over your words slightly. 

“It’s not about that,” he said, voice tight. You were getting further and further out of the city. 

“James, you’re starting to worr-” you began, but he cut you off.

“What are your parent’s names?” he asked suddenly, throwing you a cold glance.

Your blood froze and you hesitated only for a second before answering. “Anne and Peter… why?” you asked, tilting your head as you looked at him, confused. Whatever you’d expected him to say, it wasn’t that.

“And where do they live?” he asked, turning off the freeway at an exit you didn’t recognize.

“They’re… originally from Rome, but they have a home in Florida, now,” you said, growing more paranoid by the second. What brought this sudden line of questioning on, and why did he decide to take you to his place now of all times?

“Where in Florida?” James asked, glancing at you out of the corner of his eye. 

You willed yourself not to fidget. “Why does it matter?” you asked, raising an eyebrow at him as the car sped down the long cement road. It didn’t seem like there was anyone or anything around for miles. 

He chewed on his lip for a moment before he answered. “No, I don’t suppose it matters,” he said, and something in his tone had a finality to it that nearly made you shudder. You realized there were buildings ahead and your eyes snapped to them, eager for an escape from whatever hellish car ride you were in. When you saw the logo on the side of the largest building, you nearly vomited. 

A large letter “A” was plastered in white paint on the side of the building. “The Avengers compound?” you asked, incredulous. You were itching to jump out of the car, but he was going fast enough you might not survive the bailout. 

“Yeah, I… work here, I suppose,” he said evasively as he pulled into the garage… The underground garage with large, thick, cement, vault-like doors. With armed guards. You willed yourself to stay calm. You could make it out of this. There was no way they could know who you were unless you gave yourself away.

As he pulled into a parking spot you put on a shocked expression, excitement tingeing your voice. “Wait, does that mean you know the Avengers? Can I meet them? Shit, I don’t even have my mini Captain America shield or model Mjolnir,” you said, hands flying to your face, looking out with wide eyes between your fingers.

James looked at you sideways, eyebrow raised as he turned off the car. “You’re a fan of the Avengers? You never said anything about that,” he said, barely hiding his suspicious tone. 

“Well, it’s… kind of embarrassing, you know? Women and men alike all fawn over the Avengers and I didn’t want to be one of them… But I appreciate what they’ve done for us… They’re heroes,” you said, looking down, pretending to be self-conscious. It wasn’t difficult; saying those things _was_ embarrassing.

“I suppose they do get that a lot, yeah. I bet they’ll find it refreshing that you don’t have something for them to sign,” he said, small smile pulling at the corner of his lips. 

“So you _do_ know them?” you asked, false eagerness returning. 

For some reason, your tone made him frown. “Yeah, I do,” he said, sounding less than thrilled by the fact. 

“You make it sound like that’s a bad thing,” you said curiously, smile fading. 

He seemed to remember where he was and opened the car door. “Shall we?” he asked, motioning towards the door at the other end of the garage. You decided to ignore the fact he neatly dodged the question. 

You opened your door, nearly vibrating with nervousness that you hoped to pass off as excitement. “Oh god, what if they don’t like me?” you asked as you shut the car door, falling into step beside James as you made your way towards the garage’s exit.

“I’ve told them all about you, Doll, they already love you.” His smile wasn’t as bright as usual.

You pretended not to notice. “Oh god, what did you say? If you told them about that one time with the pizza I’ll-” you began, tone suddenly strict, but he cut you off.

“Only good things. I promise,” he said, opening the door for you. 

Your heart sank when you saw the security checkpoint. You had a gun in your purse, which they’d surely find. You didn’t usually need a gun, but now you were in the Avengers base. You didn’t want to part with any weapon if you didn’t have to.

“Wait, what about that one time last month when I-” you began, stalling the inevitable as much as you could while you thought about plans of action. Your traitor brain came up with nothing, though, and the security checkpoint was getting closer by the second, James setting a casual pace.

“No, they don’t know about that,” he assured you, waving casually to the stationed guards. He was obviously well-known around here. “I haven’t told them about all the ridiculous or embarrassing things you’ve done, (Y/N),” he said, rolling his eyes as he strolled casually through the metal detector. 

It went off but the guards didn’t so much as flinch. They even nodded to him as he passed. You followed, brazenly clutching your purse to your side instead of placing it on the x-ray’s conveyor belt. The metal detector predictably went off and the guards moved to stop you, but James waved them off. 

“It’s alright, guys, she’s with me,” he said, motioning for you to follow him. 

They saluted and went back to their posts. Whoever James was within the Avengers administration, his position seemed to be pretty high. 

“Dude, are you a superhero or something?” you asked, pretending to be awestruck as you took in the ground level of the largest building in the compound. Agents milled about, scurrying to and fro like busy worker bees. You spun around on your heels as you followed James, pretending to take in the sights like a starry-eyed fangirl, but you were actually getting a rough layout of the building, searching for exits and paths of escape. 

“Something like that,” he mumbled, quiet enough that you didn’t hear. “Come on, (Y/N). You wanted to meet the Avengers, yeah?” he asked, loud enough for you to hear. 

“Oh my god, right now?” you asked, hoping your fear came off as nervousness. 

“Yup. Steve, Natasha, and Sam are going out on a mission later today so this is the only chance you’ll get for a couple days,” he said, blatantly lying. If you were what he feared you were, he wouldn’t dare give out sensitive information like that. He’d just hope you’d buy it. 

“That’s so fucking cool,” you said, smiling broadly as you followed James down one of the hallways to an elevator. “Will they be all suited up?” you asked, sounding excited by the prospect when really the thought terrified you. 

“Probably not. The mission isn’t for a few hours,” James explained, hitting the button for the elevator. It appeared you’d be going down below ground. Fucking fantastic.

“Damn…. that would have been _so_ cool,” you said, sounding disappointed. Inside, you were elated. That would give you a chance, slim as it was. It was easier to take out a person if they didn’t have Kevlar and an arsenal of weapons protecting them. 

The elevator arrived only a couple seconds later and you and James stepped inside. You went to the back wall and spun, leaned against it, and stared at the hallway you’d just come from. James pressed one of the buttons on the wall. It looked like you’d be going at least ten floors down.

As the door slowly shut a sense of dread hit you. You suddenly felt like a trapped animal. A sinking feeling in your gut told you something terrible was going to happen, and your gut was almost never wrong.

“And away we go,” James said quietly as the elevator began its slow descent downwards.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: ‘I’m a superhero and you’re my arch nemesis but we don’t know each other’s identities and we’re actually best friends’
> 
> You’re best friends with Bucky, although you know him as James Ranier. He’s your best friend, too, but he has no idea you’re actually Shade, a woman who plagues the reformed Winter Soldier’s life as his arch nemesis. Bucky’s suspicion only grows, and he takes you to meet the Avengers. What could possibly go wrong?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female!Mutant!Reader
> 
> Warnings: Violence, Swearing (always), blood
> 
> Word Count: ~3,377
> 
> A/N: Alright guys, shit hits the fan (surprise surprise)
> 
> This Chapter was inspired by My Way by Frank Sinatra.

[Originally posted by yourboi-steverogers-imagines](https://tmblr.co/ZqwNAj2NfzGt3)

You watched the floors tick by as the elevator took you deeper into the compound, your anxiety growing by the second. 

“What brought all of this on all of a sudden?” you asked, turning to smile at James. “You know I’m not usually one for surprises… although I’ll make an exception for this one,” you said, winking at him. 

“Just thought you should finally see what I do for a living, Doll,” he said, not looking at you. 

A second later the elevator came to a gentle halt and the doors silently slid open. James motioned for you to go first and you did, stepping out slowly, looking both ways in genuine confusion. “Which way?” you asked, turning back to look at James, who was closer than you thought he’d be. 

“Left,” he said simply, a single gloved finger pointed lazily in the direction he’d indicated.

“I’m so nervous… I’m actually going to meet the Avengers!” you practically squealed, putting an excited skip in your step as you made your way down the hallway.

“Right,” he said as you came to a crossroads. You went the direction he’d said, pretending to look around eagerly when in reality you were once again mapping out the area. 

“Oh god, what do I say? Do I call Captain America Steve or Captain? Or Captain Rogers? Should it be Ms. Romanoff or Natasha? Can I call the Falcon ‘Sam’? Would he be offended if I use Steve Rogers’ military title, but not his? And oh god what about-” James cut off your rambling, telling you to turn left once more. 

“Ask them yourself,” he said quietly and you nearly froze in fear. A good chunk of the Avengers stood before you in a high-tech kitchen area, their idle chatter stopping as you and James came into view. You’d hoped they’d all assume it was you being starstruck. You let out a tiny terrified squeak. 

[Originally posted by 08sarchive](https://tmblr.co/ZC19Cf2LOSFAl)

Steve was the first one to step forward. “Nice to finally meet you, (Y/N). My name’s Steve Rogers, but you can just call me Steve. We’ve heard all about you,” Steve said as he held out his hand, throwing a smile to James over your shoulder.

“I know who you are,” you said breathlessly, playing the part of a starstruck fan perfectly. “You heard all good things, I hope?” you whispered tentatively, taking his offered hand and giving him a shy smile. 

“Of course,” he said, but something wasn’t quite right with the way he said it. Before you could dwell on it, Natasha stepped forward.

[Originally posted by basicmarvelnerd](https://tmblr.co/Zk4wbk1lvFmDz)

“(Y/N)! My name’s-”

“Natasha Romanoff. You’re a badass,” you said genuinely, shaking her hand eagerly. 

She laughed at that, throwing a smirk to the others behind her. “I like her already,” she said, stepping aside to let the next person through. 

“Sam Wilson,” the Falcon said, extending his hand. You took it, smiling broadly at him.

“I know,” you smiled. “Love your suit,” you said, laying it on a bit thick.

[Originally posted by littlemisssyreid](https://tmblr.co/ZU_u7q1wKAlzK)

He beamed at that. “Man, Bucky, you didn’t say she was such a charmer,” he chuckled, toothy smile lighting up the room as he looked at the person standing behind you. 

But you didn’t see his smile. In fact, the whole world had stopped. 

Did he just say… Bucky? As in Bucky Barnes, the Winter Soldier? 

You whirled, facing James, eyes roaming up and down. 

“Bucky? Bucky Barnes?” you asked, voice barely above a whisper. 

He studied you, expression carefully controlled. If you’d been able to see behind you, you’d see that the entire team was watching you just as closely. “Yeah, that’s right,” he said slowly, examining you so closely you felt like you were under a microscope.

[Originally posted by wintersthighs](https://tmblr.co/ZpgCLr2BOvrIv)

You opened your mouth, then closed it. Then opened it again… before it snapped shut. You must have looked like a fish out of water. 

You felt your world crumble down around you. Your only friend in the world besides your brother… was your arch nemesis? The one determined to stop you at every turn, to cause you to fail, to put your brother’s life in danger? The Winter Soldier and the James you knew… were the same person? Your mind spun but it stilled at one thought. 

He knew.

He knew you were Shade. You didn’t know how he knew, but it explained his odd behavior. It explained why Steve, ever the good man, sounded like he was lying earlier. He knew, too. James- no, Bucky- must have told them all what he suspected. This was all a test. You weren’t in a cell yet, so he wasn’t sure. You had a chance. 

He wasn’t sure it was you and he wouldn’t make a move until he was sure. None of them would. They were heroes, after all. They wouldn’t hurt an innocent woman, least of all someone who’d managed to befriend the complicated James Buchanan Barnes. 

No, you’d have to play this smart if you wanted to make it out of this alive and see your brother again.

“I… thought your last name was Ranier,” you said, hoping to catch him off guard. The shock on your face was real, but you figured that you, as James’ best friend, had that right.

It seemed to work. Whatever he’d been expecting, it wasn’t that. 

“You’re… a freaking Avenger!?” you nearly yelled throwing your hands up in exasperation. “And you didn’t tell me?!” you said, just a little manic.

He glanced to the others behind you, shrugging almost imperceptibly, before he looked back at you. He wasn’t sure how to proceed. Good.

“Yeah… I guess?” he said, eyebrows furrowing in confusion as he studied you. 

“Dude, what the hell! That’s amazing!” you said, slapping his chest lightly with the back of your hand. 

At least, you were going to. He caught your wrist before your hand could make contact, his grip vice-like. You winced; the pain was real. 

“James…?” you said, voice questioning. Yeah, little everyday innocent you would definitely be confused by his actions. “What’s wrong?” you asked, sounding as genuinely confused as you could. 

His face was blank as he studied you, and you felt a chill go down your spine. You were looking at the Soldier. Maybe not the brainwashed Hydra assassin, but definitely not the James you knew in your day-to-day life. 

“Man, you’re good,” came a voice from behind you. One you recognized as Natasha’s. 

Fuck. This wasn’t going the way you wanted it to at all. 

“What? What’re you talking about?” you said, looking over your shoulder at her, allowing some of the enormous fear you felt slip to the surface. 

“Are you sure, Nat?” Steve asked, looking from her to you and back again. Sam stood silently behind them, eyeing you carefully from the other side of the kitchen island.

“Ninety-seven percent?” Nat said, shrugging slightly, throwing Steve a coy smile. 

“Sure of what?” you squeaked, eyes darting between her and Steve.

“That you’re Shade,” Bucky said quietly, his voice raspy. Your head whipped back around and you hoped you pulled off the mother of all confused faces. 

“… Paid? Paid to what?” you asked, eyes darting around in mock thought and confusion.

 _Shit shit shit,_ You swore to yourself, trying to think of a way out of this when it went south. Because it _was_ going to go south- very soon. 

“Don’t play stupid, Shade. It’s beneath you,” he hissed, face close to yours as his grip tightened on your wrist. 

You winced, letting your eyes widen in fear as you stared at him and pretended to sputter.

But you knew it was useless as you looked into his eyes. His mind was made up. 

“You know, I didn’t know it was you,” you said quietly, immediately straightening up and hiding your fear. “The Winter Soldier- Bucky Barnes-, that is. I really had no idea,” you said, taking a sort of sick satisfaction as Bucky’s face twisted with rage. “Although, looking at you now, I have no idea how I missed it. Must’ve been the face mask,” you said, smirking devilishly at him as you playfully placed your free hand over the lower half of your face in a childlike imitation of the mask he wore whenever you fought him.

“Shade, you’re coming with-” he began, voice deadly, but you cut him off.

“Oh, save it. I’ve heard the dialogue too many times before. It gets old after the hundredth time,” you said, rolling your eyes. 

You glanced behind you, groaning when you saw Sam, Steve, and Natasha all ready, weapons drawn.

“Damn, four against one? I thought you were supposed to be the good guys,” you said, smiling broadly as you turned back to Bucky. 

“Depends on who you ask,” Bucky said viciously, twisting your arm, forcing you to spin so you were facing the others, and pinned it behind your back. 

Pain radiated through your arm and shoulder. “Alright, Dream Team, let’s do this,” you hissed through clenched teeth, jaw set in determination.

You threw your head back into Bucky’s face. It made a satisfying, sickening, crunch and he released your wrist to hold his nose, surprised. 

Natasha was closest and reached you first. You traded a few lightning-fast punches. You knew she liked to use her opponent’s size against them, but you were close in height. You were just as agile, if not more so. You landed a lucky kick to the side of her knee and she temporarily dropped. You knew that had to hurt. 

You didn’t have time to think before Steve and Bucky were on you. You barely sensed Bucky in time, ducking just in time to dodge his grab for you. You didn’t have time to rest, jumping up and kicking out at Steve who had tried to leg sweep you while you were dodging Bucky. It hit him square in the chest and his breath left him in a _whoosh_ , but it barely sent him back a foot. 

_Damn super soldier._

You spun and sent a punch straight for Bucky’s solar plexus. He hadn’t been expecting you to move as fast as you did and it connected, earning a grunt from the soldier. 

_That would have cracked bones on normal people. Goddamned super soldiers._

You heard it rather than saw it and ducked just in time. Steve’s shield sailed safely over your head and straight into Bucky’s chest. You couldn’t help the grin that slid onto your face. 

A swift punch from Natasha quickly wiped it off. You tasted blood but didn’t pause to assess the damage. 

Time was ticking down. You couldn’t fight them forever. 

[Originally posted by fuckyeahphysica](https://tmblr.co/Z-Yauk1lYvEYM)

You heard the explosion of a gun and a half second later agony ripped through your shoulder, blood spraying onto Natasha, who didn’t seem to notice as she continued to throw punches your way. Your left arm dropped to your side, useless.

 _Wilson_. You hadn’t kept track of Wilson, too preoccupied by the melee. 

You tried your best to keep up with Nat’s punches while also keeping track of Bucky and Steve. They seemed to be recovering. Steve had his shield back and Bucky, whose nose was still running with blood, had taken his jacket and gloves off. His metal arm glinted menacingly in the artificial light. You knew Sam was lining up another shot from across the kitchen. He wouldn’t take it unless Steve, Natasha, and Bucky were clear, though. Even if you could get them down for the count, Sam would take you out.

 _I’m fucked. I’m so fucked,_ you thought to yourself. Gabe flashed before your eyes and you steeled yourself. Failure was not an option. Dying was not an option. You had to protect him. 

You roared your frustration. They wouldn’t keep you from him. You’d kill all of them if it meant he would be safe. Alive. 

Your instincts took over, pulling the knives out of your boots. Your movements were lightning-fast, practiced over the hundreds of years you’d been alive. It felt like breathing. You ignored the pain in your arm and the agony faded to nonexistence as your adrenaline spiked. 

They were good. All three were so good at fighting. The boys packed a nasty punch and worked together just like you knew they could. Even Steve and Natasha worked together like a well-oiled machine. 

They had trouble keeping up with you. They couldn’t match lifetimes worth of training and discipline… at least, not if it was only one or two of them. 

You were losing. You knew you were. Blood streamed out of your shoulder. It stained your shirt and you knew you had maybe three more minutes of this before you fainted. You managed to down Natasha for a moment and took the opening you’d been waiting for.

You dove for your purse and dug for your gun, but it was gone. 

“Looking for this, Shade?” Bucky asked, pistol in-hand, aiming steadily right between your eyes.

“Now, now, James. Isn’t going through a woman’s purse… _beneath you_?” you asked, venom lacing your words as you stood slowly, hands raised. You dropped your knives, not wanting to give him a reason to shoot. He was out of reach and you knew he’d put a bullet in your skull before you’d make it more than an inch. Steve was kneeling in front of Natasha, shield raised in protection. You spotted Sam out of the corner of your eye, gun trained on you.

“You have a lot to answer for, Shade,” he growled, still as a statue. 

“That’s not my name,” you said, glaring at him. 

“Well it sure as hell isn’t (Y/N),” he said, glaring daggers at you.

You rolled your eyes, “Yes, it is,” you said obstinately. “And before you fight me more on that, hear me out,” you said, trying your best to salvage the situation. If you passed out or they put you into custody, Gabe was as good as dead. 

“Why the hell would we do that?” Natasha hissed as she clutched at her knee. You wondered if you’d done some lasting damage. You hoped not.

“They have Gabe,” you said, locking eyes with Bucky. 

His gun lowered a millimeter as he studied your face.

“If I don’t do what they say, they kill him. There’s a chip in his brain. Tiny explosive. Remote detonation,” you explained, willing him to believe you.

“They? You mean Shadow?” Steve asked, not lowering his shield. 

You nodded, eyes never leaving Bucky’s, still begging him to understand. 

“Buck?” Steve asked, looking to his friend for the next move. Apparently Bucky took the lead when it came to you. 

He stared at you for a long moment before he spoke. “Did you know it was me? All along?” he asked, voice deadly calm.

You shook your head, a humorless laugh leaving your lips. “No. Apparently I’m the last one to arrive at the secret identity revelation party,” you said, hoping he could tell you were being honest. 

You couldn’t read his face.

“Gabe? Gabriel’s a hostage?” he asked, eyes narrowing. 

“Who the hell is Gabe?” Sam asked from his spot across the room.

“My brother,” you answered the same time Bucky said “her brother.”

“Is that why you’ve been doing all this? Committing all those crimes?” Natasha asked, eyeing you from behind Steve. 

You nodded slowly, swallowing thickly. “If I fail in any way, he dies. If I don’t report in daily, he dies,” you explained. 

“You put his life before the lives of innocent people,” Steve said as he stood, shield still up in a defensive position. 

“He’s innocent, too. And… he’s all I have,” you said, eyes to the ground. You didn’t see the brief flash of emotion that passed over Bucky’s face.

“What do you mean? Sure you have other family? Friends?” Sam asked, raising an eyebrow at you. 

“I had family, once. About 900 years ago, in fact,” you stated simply. “And… I had a friend, until today,” you said, glancing at Bucky. His face remained impassive, but his eyes were a storm of emotion. 

“Wait, wait. Hold up. Rewind. Did you just say 900 years ago?” Sam said, his tone making it clear he thought he’d misheard. 

“Yes, I did,” you said, not breaking eye contact with Bucky.

“How… is that possible?” Steve asked, eyeing you up and down in disbelief. 

“I think you call us mutants in this era? My genetic code isn’t completely human,” you explained, finally looking away from Bucky to glance at Steve. “I don’t age. Neither does Gabe. I’ve been Shadow’s slave since the first World War. They’ve updated their methods over the years, but he’s always been held as a hostage to ’ _ensure my cooperation_.’ This latest installment is both the best and the worst method they’ve used. I can finally see him but I know that, at any moment, they can kill him… and they don’t even have to be in the same continent. Do you know what that’s like? To see the person you love in front of you and know you can’t keep them safe? To know that their life is in someone else’s hands?” you asked each of them, looking them in the eye individually as you spoke. “I fought them in small ways. Tried to minimize casualties. Didn’t kill unless I was directly ordered to. But I did what I had to to keep my brother alive. He’s been with me for nearly a millennium. The only staple in my life,” you said, glaring at them in challenge. Your vision swam and you cursed to yourself. Blood loss was finally catching up to you. 

There was a brief moment of silence before Sam spoke again.

“Oh, come on. That’s impossible,” he said looking at the others as though they were insane for believing you.

“Sam, we’re friends with a Norse God, our friend turns into a giant green rage monster, and we stopped an alien invasion. Is immortality really that unbelievable?” Steve asked, raising an eyebrow at his friend. Sam groaned and rubbed his temple.

“I’m not invincible. I can be killed. Chop off my head, stab me, shoot me a few times? Dead as a doornail. I’m immune to disease, though, so that’s nice I guess,” you said, swaying slightly where you stood. Was the room getting wavy or was that just you? “I suppose I could bleed out, too,” you said faintly, falling to your knees. Black spots swam in your vision and you silently cursed your body.

“-Have information on Shadow- USB in purse will prove it. Help my brother, I’ll get you the rest,” you hissed. Your clutched at your left shoulder. You couldn’t feel it.

You remembered looking down at your shoulder. It was red. Very red. You also remembered voices, though you couldn’t make out the words. 

“Please,” you said. Or at least, you meant to. You couldn’t tell if you got the words out.

Then, everything went black.

[Originally posted by xesoteric-extraterrestrialx](https://tmblr.co/ZUs5Me2NBhc_z)

 


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: ‘I’m a superhero and you’re my arch nemesis but we don’t know each other’s identities and we’re actually best friends’
> 
> You’re best friends with Bucky, although you know him as James Ranier. He’s your best friend, too, but he has no idea you’re actually Shade, a woman who plagues the reformed Winter Soldier’s life as his arch nemesis. You faint from blood loss in the Avengers compound and the heroes themselves have to decide what to do with you. Gabe’s life and your own hinges on their decision.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female!Mutant!Reader
> 
> Warnings: Violence, Swearing (always), blood, angst
> 
> A/N: Angst. So much angst. And yelling. Poor Bucky. Poor reader.
> 
> This chapter was inspired by Alone Together by Fall Out Boy.

[Originally posted by captaincentenarian](https://tmblr.co/ZMNc-g2BRl0HD)

**Bucky’s POV**

Bucky watched as you collapsed on the kitchen floor, shirt half red with your own blood. Steve immediately checked on you while Nat went to your purse, fishing through it until she pulled out the USB you’d mentioned. Sam was calling the med ward, warning them that Steve was bringing you to them and that you’d been shot and lost a lot of blood.

Bucky couldn’t move. He didn’t know what to do.

You were supposed to be normal. Well, maybe not normal. You’d always been extraordinary, but you were supposed to be a civilian.

You made him feel normal… like he wasn’t an ex-assassin turned hero. When he was around you he simply felt like a man. A _good_ man, even.

The betrayal stung his lungs. He found it hard to breathe. He wanted to help (Y/N). Get her to the med ward and sit by her side until she came to, but he wanted to drag Shade to an interrogation room and work Shadow’s innermost dealings from her mind.

His two lives had come together in the worst possible way and it had left Bucky in a free fall, unable to process the events.

He didn’t hear Natasha call his name the first few times. He watched numbly as Steve left the room with (Y/N)-Shade in his arms. It was only after they’d disappeared around the corner that Bucky became aware of Natasha in front of him, calling his name.

“Bucky! Snap out of it!” she said, snapping her fingers in his face. “Get your shit together. We don’t have time for this,” she ordered. Although her words were harsh, her tone was surprisingly understanding. “We need to find out if she’s telling the truth, and you know her better than anyone,” Nat said, holding up the USB that allegedly held Shadow intel.

“Do I?” he asked, his voice raspy as though he hadn’t used it years.

Natasha slumped, a large sigh leaving her lips. “Yes, you do. You know more about her than the SHIELD database, at least. For all of her alleged years alive, she sure as hell is hard to track down. We have-”

“Nothing, I know,” he said quietly. “Just basic height and weight and fighting patterns. Whatever Steve and I got over the years,” Bucky said, glaring past Natasha, mind beginning to wander down darker paths.

“Hey, hey. Focus. It’s not your fault. Even _I_ would have been fooled if you hadn’t told us your suspicions earlier. It’s not your fault,” she said, placing a hand gently on his shoulder.

The comforting gesture snapped his attention back to the present and he heaved out a huge sigh.

“Stark and Banner will be here soon. Everyone else is still out on missions and won’t be back for a few days at least,” Sam said quietly. Bucky had almost forgotten he was there. “If what she said is true, time is of the essence. Something about her brother, right? I doubt she’ll help us if he gets blown to bits,” he said, crossing his arms as he leaned against the kitchen island.

“Was she telling the truth about that?” Nat asked, raising en eyebrow at Bucky.

“I think it’s true that Gabe’s really her brother. I’m not sure about the whole chip-in-the-brain thing, though,” Bucky said, wiping a hand over his face. Today was definitely a top five contender on his list of Worst Days Ever, and he’d been kidnapped, tortured, and fallen hundreds of feet off of a speeding train.

“Then we better figure out what’s on that USB, and fast,” Sam said, nodding his head towards the tech lab.

“Sam and I can handle this. You should… be there when she wakes up,” Nat said, frowning as she studied Bucky’s face, looking for a reaction.

Bucky looked from Natasha to Sam and back before he nodded, expression severe. “Fine, but only because she’s most likely to talk to me and I don’t wanna leave Steve and the doctors alone with her,” he said quietly. He didn’t wait for a response from the other two before he exited the kitchen and made his way up two floors to the medical center.

* * *

**Your POV**

Consciousness returned to you in pieces. First, your hearing returned. Your foggy brain incorporated the sound of doctors talking and working into a melancholy day dream.

Then, your sense of feeling returned. A finger twitched and you were suddenly aware you were awake, not dreaming.

You opened an eye a crack and blinding white light flooded your vision so you quickly shut it again. You tried to move your arm so you could block out the light with a hand, but you realized you couldn’t move your arm at all. You opened your eyes fully, wincing against the light, and took in your surroundings. It became apparent immediately why exactly you couldn’t move your arms. All of your limbs had been cuffed to the bed frame and a thick leather strap around your chest kept you even more firmly in place.

An IV was hooked up to the back of your hand and you stared at it in disgust. You hated needles. Hospitals, too. You looked at your shoulder and assessed the damage. It seemed that the bleeding had stopped and the fact that you couldn’t feel anything meant they had you on some high end pain killers. What you could make out, however, was a mountain of gauze. 

Done with your self assessment, you turned your attention to the room around you. It was a high-tech hospital room, that also seemed to double as a prison cell. Great.

Doctors and nurses milled about, occasionally stopping to talk to the two huge men in the room who stuck out like sore thumbs.

Steve Rogers and… _Bucky Barnes_ , your best friend and arch nemesis.

Bucky must have sensed your gaze because his head turned and his eyes locked with yours. Steve was talking to him, but Bucky didn’t seem to hear him. You swore the room went quiet around you as you stared back at him. You willed him to understand even though you knew it was impossible. He tore his gaze from you and turned to Steve, his face twisted in rage.

“I shouldn’t be here, Steve,” he growled, staring down the blond man.

Steve sighed, running a hand over his face in exhaustion. “We need you here, Buck. Shade has always been your area of-”

“I don’t care, Steve! I didn’t sign up for this!” he yelled. His anger hadn’t gotten the better of him in years, but the recent events had set him back years; towards his darker days. The doctors and nurses were frozen, staring at Bucky and Steve in shock. He seemed to realize the tension his outburst had caused and he quickly mumbled apologies to the staff.

You wanted to comfort him- Your best friend. But now, with his metal arm out in the open, you were violently reminded he wasn’t your best friend. Not anymore. You were about to speak up and ask them about progress when the doors opened and someone you hadn’t expected to see walked in.

[Originally posted by kingdowney](https://tmblr.co/ZZIVah2QUR_NY)

“Alright, so I have a few questions for the mysterious immortal woman. How exactly did you get this information? I’m Tony Stark, by the way,” he said, completely ignoring the other people in the room. He tapped away at the tablet computer in his hands, eyes scanning the information on its surface as he made his way over to you.

Steve turned, surprised by Tony’s sudden entrance. When his eyes landed on your conscious form his expression turned severe and he walked over to you and Tony, Bucky trailing reluctantly behind.

“I know who you are,” you said, rolling your eyes at him. He was just as pompous as you thought he’d be.

“Yes, I’m very famous, Blah blah blah, how did you get this information?” he asked, tone more severe than you’d ever heard it on TV. He held the tablet out in front of your face and you glanced at it. On the screen were blueprints you’d secretly gotten copies of. Very high tech, very deadly. It was just the tip of the iceberg if your data mining skills were to be trusted.

“Shadow servers. Not a lot of people have access. Even _I_ only have limited access: I’m nothing but a tool to them… but I’m a damn good hacker. Their security is truly top notch. I only have enough time to download a little information at a time, and that’s part of the most recent cache. They’re planning something big, but I’m not paid the big bucks. I don’t know what their endgame is… but I might be able to find out,” you said, glancing between the three of them as you spoke. Your gaze lingered on Bucky more often than it should have. Looking at him hurt each time. “For a price, of course,” you said, gaze hardening.

“You’re strapped to a chair with a bullet hole in your shoulder and a rap sheet longer than this room is tall and you want to negotiate?” Tony asked, raising an eyebrow. “That _is_ bold. And, if I may say, imbecilic.”

“I’m your only lead. You’ve been tracking Shadow for years and haven’t come even close to cracking the organization. I would know,” you said, tone blunt. “You. Need. Me. And you’re wasting time. My price has an expiration date. If my brother dies I can guarantee you won’t like what comes after,” you said, glaring at all of them. “Save my brother and I’ll tell you everything I know,” you said, head falling back onto your pillows. “Those are my terms,” you said, glaring at the ceiling.

“You said there was a chip in his brain? Something about explosives?” Steve asked, voice kinder than you expected it to be.

You nodded. “Shadow didn’t give me the details, but they did give me a grisly demonstration in the form of exploding the head of an agent who’d failed a mission. It’s remote detonation. The agent didn’t even see it coming. He’d thought he’d been given a second chance. Stupid bastard. Needless to say, I didn’t feel like testing if it’d work a second time on my brother,” you said quietly.

“I can work something out. I should be able to knock out the device with a short ranged-” Tony began, but you cut him off.

“ _’Should be’_?” you asked, turning your head to glare up at him.

“If you’re looking for a guarantee, I can’t give that. Best I can do is an 87% chance of success,” Tony said jovially.

You were thankful for the painkillers. They made breaking your thumb from the pressure of pulling your hand out of your handcuff almost unnoticeable. Almost. You had Tony’s expensive tie in your grasp before Steve and Bucky even realized what was happening. You yanked it hard until his face was inches from yours.

“Do better than 87%, Mr. Stark,” you hissed, shoving him backwards as Bucky and Steve rushed forward to restrain you. You glared at him as he exited the room backwards, eyes locked with yours as he fixed his tie, eyes wide with fear. “And don’t you dare leave him in that fucking hospital!” You yelled just before the door shut.

“Damnit, Shade. Was that really necessary?” Bucky hissed, holding you down as Steve velcro-strapped your wrists and arms to the bed.

“Yes,” you growled. “And that’s not. My. Name,” you said, gaze locking onto his.

Steve glanced between the two of you and realized he wanted to be anywhere but there just then. “If Tony’s here it means Dr. Banner is probably back, too. I’m going to go get him. He might be able to clear up the whole mutant DNA thing,” he said hastily, exiting even quicker than Tony had.

Bucky merely grunted in acknowledgement as he glared at you intently. “I’m not calling you (Y/N),” he said, pulling up a chair so he could sit a few feet away from you; likely so that he was close enough to stop you quickly if need be.

“And why not? It’s my name,” you said grumpily. Your pain meds were wearing off and you were suddenly regretting breaking your thumb to get at Tony.

“Because it was a lie. You lied to me for years,” he said, glaring darkly at you.

You rolled your eyes at him. “And you didn’t lie to me?” you asked, temper short from how much pain you were in.

“That’s not the same,” he growled, tense in his seat.

“Isn’t it?” you asked, voice challenging. “I didn’t tell you about my time as Shade to keep you- no, James- safe from that life,” you said, wishing he’d understand. His steel blue eyes searched yours and you didn’t realize until that exact moment how much you missed your best friend. “I already lost my brother to them and I didn’t-” your voice died in your throat you and looked away from Bucky, unable to look him in the eye. “-I didn’t want to lose you, too,” you whispered.

“I just don’t know what I can believe anymore,” he said quietly. You turned your head back to look at him but his eyes were trained on the ground in front of him. “You weren’t… you were supposed to be normal,” he whispered, gaze lifting slowly until it met yours.

“So were you,” you said, sardonic smile on your lips.   

It looked like he was about to say something but the door to your room opened again and Natasha and Tony walked in, closely followed by Steve and someone you recognized as Doctor Bruce Banner.

[Originally posted by littlemisssyreid](https://tmblr.co/ZU_u7q1wHV5e1)

“So?” Bucky asked them, tearing his gaze away from you.

“Intel looks good and it’s more than we’ve gotten in the last year. We can do some serious damage to Shadow on this information alone, not to mention what more like it would do,” Natasha informed him, tossing him hard copies of some of the information on the flash drive. He caught it, glancing through it briefly before Bruce spoke up, grabbing his attention.

“I’ve looked into the blood samples we got. Her genetic code really is irregular. It produces redundant systems and due to the mutation of proteins in her cells-”

“Bruce, I have a sinking feeling I’m not going to understand any of your explanation,” Bucky said, sighing as he leaned back in his chair.

Bruce looked to Tony, who shrugged. “I understood all of it perfectly earlier,” Tony said, sounding as though they’d been talking about something as simple as making baking soda volcanoes. Bruce looked to Natasha and Steve, who gave noncommittal shrugs.

“You could have just told me you didn’t understand what I was saying, guys,” Bruce said, sighing as he removed his glasses and rubbed his face in exhaustion.

“You and Tony were on a roll. Didn’t want to interrupt,” Natasha said, smiling fondly at the doctor who smiled shyly and shifted awkwardly at her attention.

“Well, what it boils down to is that Ms. (Y/L/N) really is immortal, as she claims. I can’t tell exactly how old she is from her bloodwork alone, but it is safe to say she could be thousands of years old,” Bruce said, looking as though he couldn’t quite believe what he was saying. 

“How rude. I’m only 934 for your information. The nerve of young men these days,” you said jokingly, grinning at all of them. They didn’t react. “Damn, tough crowd,” you mumbled, looking away from them to stare at the eggshell walls.

“So as far as we can tell, she’s telling the truth?” Steve asked, sounding dubious.

“It does seem that way, yes,” Natasha said, glancing between you and Bucky. You looked back at them in time to see Bucky nod in acknowledgement.

“Well now that that’s out of the way, your next step is clear. Get my brother out of Shadow’s grasp. Alive. I can’t be there; they’d see me coming a mile away. Not to mention I have a hole in my shoulder and a medication-fogged brain. You’ll have to disable the remote detonator somehow before you make a move on Gabe himself. As far as I know the hospital’s staff is clean. I doubt they have agents stationed inside.The problems come after you exit the hospital. They definitely have Gabe under observation. The second you show your hand they’ll move to stop you,” you said, voice almost militaristic in your instructions. You were looking at Bucky as you spoke, but he was avoiding your gaze, staring at the ground, seemingly lost in thought.

“I have an idea about disabling the chip. FRIDAY, can you get Wilson and his suit up to my lab asap? Make sure he brings that little drone. It’s important,” Tony spoke to the ceiling. An Irish brogue answered. An AI, it seemed.

“Right away, Mr. Stark,” it answered as Tony left the room with Bruce trailing after.

Bucky heaved out a sigh before he spoke up. “Natasha, Steve. You two and Wilson will be the ground team. I can’t go in, they’ll-”

“No,” you said obstinately, glaring at him.

He finally looked at you, blue-grey eyes boring into yours. “No?” he asked simply, seemingly shocked.

“You’re going,” You said, gaze hard.

“I’ll just put him in danger-” Bucky said, tone heating up. What right did you have to order him around?

“You’re the only one I trust with Gabe. Besides, if they knew you were The Soldier they would have killed Gabe ages ago… probably the first time I took you to visit him,” you said stubbornly. “You’re going,” you said again, jaw set.

Natasha and Steve looked at each other, unsure, watching your battle of wills.

“Steve, Nat. Go get the blueprints for the hospital and surrounding area and start coming up with an extraction plan,” he said, voice deadly quiet. They nodded and exited quickly, sensing the oncoming storm. The second the door shut Bucky spoke, anger barely controlled.

“You don’t give the orders around here, _Shade_ ,” Bucky spat, standing up suddenly.

“Oh stop throwing that sanctimonious shit in my face, _James_ ,” you hissed. He recoiled at the use of his name as though you’d slapped him. “Do you think I _liked_ hurting people? You think I _wanted_ to do any of the shit Shadow told me to do? I was a good person before Shadow sunk their festering claws into me! For the last hundred years I’ve held onto every scrap of sanity I could come by, hoping one day I’d be able to rescue my brother and escape Shadow! You don’t get to stand there and lecture me on right and wrong, James Buchanan Barnes! You can’t stand there and believe me beyond redemption with a past like yours!” you yelled, but it seemed like you’d crossed a line with the last thing you said.

[Originally posted by daily-cup-of-writing](https://tmblr.co/ZLb27k1oLaCNS)

He was bent over your bed in a flash, eyes alight with anger, fingers digging into the guard rails of the hospital bed. “Don’t you _dare_ compare me to you! It’s exactly my past that makes me think you _are_ beyond redemption!” he bellowed. The bed’s railings squealed as his metal hand crushed it. He released it suddenly, the metal warping dangerously before his fingers let go.

Your eyes didn’t leave Bucky’s, unwilling to back down. His gaze roamed your face as his chest heaved, adrenaline running through his veins. Without warning he turned and stormed out of the room, leaving you to dwell on his words.

Although the entire confrontation replayed itself in your head over and over again, one thought kept popping up. _  
_

_Does he think himself beyond redemption?_ you wondered quietly, your only answer the beeping of machines.

[Originally posted by suckerfordeep](https://tmblr.co/ZPeW2f2HIchwp)

 


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: ‘I’m a superhero and you’re my arch nemesis but we don’t know each other’s identities and we’re actually best friends’
> 
> You’re best friends with Bucky, although you know him as James Ranier. He’s your best friend, too, but he has no idea you’re actually Shade, a woman who plagues the reformed Winter Soldier’s life as his arch nemesis. The team is ready to save your brother, but your relationship with Bucky seems to get worse by the hour.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female!Mutant!Reader
> 
> Warnings: Violence, Swearing (always), blood, angst
> 
> A/N: *technical jargon and pseudoscience intensifies* I don’t think this chapter is my best one so far, but I think it’s important because it really shows a shift in both the reader’s and Bucky’s views. I hope the length is made bearable by the action and team banter.
> 
> This Chapter was inspired by I Will Survive by Cake.

[Originally posted by wintersthighs](https://tmblr.co/ZpgCLr2BOtcbs)

An hour later, Steve Rogers appeared in your room, carrying a tablet and a small communications device. 

“We’re going to let you watch from here, on this. You know Shadow better than we do. If something’s wrong or if things go south, your information might be invaluable. Unless we’re in imminent danger, I hafta ask that you stay quiet. Your presence seems to… unhinge Bucky at the moment,” Steve said, voice yet again kinder than you expected. He moved the bed’s built in table so that it was over you and placed the tablet on top, propping it up by its built-in stand. It flickered to life immediately and showed different security feeds in and around the hospital. He placed the comm carefully into your ear and checked the tablet one last time before he spoke again. “The comm will turn on when we approach the hospital.”

You stared at him, studying him closely, before you responded. “Understood. I won’t do anything to put Gabe in danger,” you assured him. He nodded and moved to leave, but you made him pause. “And when you get back you’re going to tell me why you’re being so nice to me,” you said, tone strict. 

He didn’t turn around. He simply nodded and kept walking out the door. 

* * *

An hour later the comm came to life. From what you could understand, Natasha, Steve, Bucky, and Sam would be going in undercover with Tony on standby. Banner was present as a last resort and also as a doctor for Gabe if things went wrong. Tony would knock out the chip in Gabe’s brain with a precision short-range EMP, making it safe to transport Gabe without worrying about his brain exploding. It was a solid plan. The Iron Man would draw too much attention, but you knew the other four, especially Bucky and Natasha, could easily hide in plain sight. Apparently, the only thing Captain America needed to hide was a baseball cap and a worn-out jacket. 

According to the clock on the wall, you had an hour before you absolutely had to check in with a Shadow agent. That meant you had an hour before Gabe’s grey matter was splattered on the walls. 

“You better take care of Redwing,” you heard Sam say threateningly. 

“Hey, look who you’re talking to,” came Tony’s voice over the comm. 

“Yeah, you’re the picture of nurturing care and careful decision making,” Sam said smugly.

You sighed as you watched the video feeds, looking for any dangers they might miss. So far, it was quiet.

“Ow, my feelings,” Tony said sarcastically. 

“Just hurry up, dude,” Sam said scathingly. 

“Let’s stay focused,” Steve said sternly. 

A chorus of _“Yes, Captain”_ s came through the mic, followed by a very sardonic “Yessir, Capsicle, sir,” from Tony. 

“There, finished. Do your thing, Tweety,” Tony said to Sam who had the good grace not to give him a scathing reply. 

You watched as the door to one of the vans on the street opened and a tiny drone flew out. It flew up to the window of Gabe’s room and held steady. Movement on the other feeds caught your attention. It seemed Natasha, Steve, and Bucky were already on the move. Bucky walked in alone. It wouldn’t be suspicious for him to visit. He was even on Gabe’s approved visitor list. Steve and Natasha walked hand-in-hand, looking like the perfect couple. You nearly missed Sam deploying the EMP via Redwing because you were too focused on Bucky. What you didn’t miss, however, were the agents that seemed to immediately pop out of the woodwork and head straight towards the hospital. 

Worse yet was that the team didn’t seem to notice them. 

“You’ve got incoming. Shadow agents. At least eight, as far as I can tell. Please tell me that that EMP worked,” you said into the comm, suddenly wishing you were there, hole-y shoulder and all. 

“Got it,” came Steve’s voice over the comm. He and Natasha picked up the pace as they got into the hospital. From what you could tell, Bucky was already on the third floor, but on the other side of the hospital from Gabe.

“Redwing’s not picking up any non-biological electrical impulses. I think it’s safe to say it’s been deactivated,” Tony said absently. There was a beat of silence, then, “Wait, was that that sassy little girl who tried to choke me with my own tie an hour ago?” Tony said, sounding alarmed and maybe slightly offended.

“They told you about that, Tony,” Bruce said quietly.

“I didn’t try to choke you. Just scare you a bit,” you said defensively. “And you have incoming on the third floor. Three agents are making a beeline for Gabe’s room,” you said, voice clinical.

“How do you know?” Steve asked quietly, looking around as surreptitiously as possible for the agents you’d mentioned. “I don’t see anything.”

“It’s the way they carry themselves. Years of Shadow training makes you carry yourself a certain way. There. That woman. The one with the flowers and dark blue jacket. About ten feet ahead of you,” you informed them. You watched as Natasha tasered her without breaking stride. Steve stopped for a moment to make a show of calling for doctors before he got up and continued with Natasha. 

“Falcon, you have two headed towards the hospital entrance. Take them out before they make it in. The tall man in the orange sunglasses and the other man in that nice tailored black suit.

“You’re sure?” Sam asked as you watched him walk towards the people you’d mentioned. 

“Oh, I’m sure. The one in the orange sunglasses got shot in my car a few days ago,” you said, glaring at the screen. “And the one in the suit always takes my coffee when I check in with him. He’s a right bastard,” you said venomously. 

“Got it,” Sam said. They didn’t see him coming and were on the ground, incapacitated, in mere moments. 

You spotted the agents before Bucky did. He was closing in on Gabe’s room, and they had, apparently, recognized him. Maybe sending him in hadn’t been such a good idea, after all. They pulled guns out of their jackets and took aim at him and your blood ran cold. 

“James, duck! Now!” you yelled. He dropped immediately and rolled into a room just in time to dodge a spray of bullets which thankfully missed the few nurses and visitors that milled about the hallway. They ran screaming as soon as the agents had opened fire. Good. You didn’t want any of them getting hurt. 

“They’re closing in on the room you went into. One’s against the wall. The other is about to-” your voice cut off and you jumped in surprise as Bucky thrust his metal fist through the wall and knocked the agent out with a single blow to the head. The other agent was still in shock when Bucky reached his other arm around the doorway and shot him without looking. 

For the first time in your life you were thankful for the Winter Soldier’s skills. 

“Third floor is clear for now. Five more agents are making their way up from the second floor. Hurry,” you said, watching as Sam took out yet another agent who’d been stupid enough to pull a gun on him.

“Were you under the impression we thought this was a lovely stroll in Central Park? We _are_ hurrying,” Natasha said dryly. 

You ignored her, choosing to instead keep an eye on the agents. “You’re closing in on Gabe’s room. Room 338. Left side,” you said, watching as Bucky turned a corner right as Steve and Natasha passed it. They nodded to each other in acknowledgement and made it the last hundred feet to Gabe’s room. 

“I don’t have access to private room cameras, but I’ve been watching the door. There shouldn’t be anyone in there,” you informed them. Natasha stood with her back to the wall and Steve and Bucky took up point positions just in case there were enemies behind the door. Natasha wrenched the door open at Steve’s signal and you let out a sigh of relief when Steve said it was clear.

“Grab Gabe and the EMP and get out of there. They’re guaranteed to have reinforcements coming,” you said, eyes flicking between each of the camera feeds. You’d expected them to go out the way they came in, so it surprised you when the glass of Gabe’s room’s windows shattered and all three of them jumped out, Gabe slung over Bucky’s shoulder. 

That was three stories down. Steve and Bucky might survive, but Natasha and Gabe-

You watched as Natasha deployed a grappling device which buried itself deep in the side of the building. She hooked it onto Steve’s belt and hung onto him for dear life. Bucky grabbed onto the rope itself with his metal hand, slowing his descent effectively. They all hit the ground gracefully, Natasha quickly disentangling herself from Steve’s arms. 

Movement down the street caught your eye. “Get out of there now. They have backup coming. Lots of it,” you warned, watching a veritable horde of SUVs make its way towards the hospital. 

“Not anymore, they don’t,” Tony said cheerfully. You were about to ask what he meant, but you didn’t have to. A second later almost all of the SUVs went up in flames. The explosions even caused the cameras to shake. “I would still hurry though. I don’t they’re going to be happy that we just blew up their agents,” Tony said affably. 

“Really? I thought it’d be fun to just hang out until they turn us into Swiss cheese,” Sam said sarcastically as he made his way to one of the getaway cars they’d placed earlier. Natasha and Steve made it into the car with Sam while Bucky headed to the van with Bruce and Tony. The second the doors shut both cars were off and headed away from the hospital as quickly as they could go in busy New York traffic. 

Once they were safely out of your cameras’ feeds you let some of the tension leave your body and slumped back onto the bed. “Good work,” you said faintly. 

“Don’t forget your end of the bargain,” came Bucky’s voice over the comms. It was the first time he’d spoken since you’d joined their channel and you realized how much you’d missed his voice just then. 

You frowned. “Understood, Soldier,” you said blandly. You didn’t wait for a response, and flicked your head to the side. The comm flew out of your ear and fell to the floor, safely out of your reach. 

 

* * *

 

A half hour later Gabe was wheeled into your room, still unconscious, with Steve, Bruce, Bucky, and Tony following closely behind the doctors. 

You narrowed your eyes at them all, gaze flicking between Gabe, the doctors, and the guys. “Why isn’t he awake?” you asked, suspicious.

“He’s going into surgery to remove the chip in his head. Didn’t seem to make sense to wake him up before that. It would probably just stress him out,” Bruce said solemnly. 

You nodded in understanding. “Let me out of these restraints. We’re on the same side, here,” you said, absolutely tired of being unable to scratch your nose… or anything else, for that matter. 

“How about we don’t do that, instead,” Tony said obstinately. “I don’t think my tie collection would survive letting you loose,” he joked, but his gaze was hard. Man, he really didn’t like you. 

“I saved your lives back there,” you said, turning your gaze on Steve, who seemed the most likely to take your side from the interactions you had with him thus far. 

Steve looked torn and threw a look to Bucky. They had a silent conversation, which apparently Steve won, because he nodded to you a moment later. 

“Fine, but you’re still wearing handcuffs,” Bucky said, fishing the keys out of his pockets, and tossed them to Steve.

“Really? We’re letting the slimy murderer out of the restraints?” Tony asked, looking at the others as though they were crazy. 

“Oh, we’re going there now, are we?” you asked, glaring at Tony. 

“I’d just like to point out she tried to kill all of you less than twelve hours ago,” Tony protested. 

Steve ignored him, unlocked your restraints, and undid the velcro straps. 

“And I suppose we’re just ignoring the fact I could have killed them a few days ago, but didn’t?” you asked, raising an eyebrow at Tony. 

“Not killing someone doesn’t make you a saint,” Tony said scathingly, as though he couldn’t believe he was having this conversation. “It makes you a normal person!” he argued. 

Steve undid the last restraint and you sat up, rubbing your wrists. You pulled out your IV and stretched. You winced at the pain in your left shoulder and resolved not to move your left arm unless you had to. 

“Please, Tony. Not a single person in this room is normal. And I never claimed to be a saint,” you said, standing slowly. Your legs were a little wobbly at first, but you quickly regained your footing and headed over to Gabe’s bed. A quick assessment revealed he was none worse for the wear. 

Suddenly, it hit you. You were free. You had Gabe back. He was going to get that infernal chip out of his head and you’d be free. You wouldn’t have to hurt people ever again. You could go back to… being _you_. 

You hadn’t realized you’d started crying until someone laid a hand gently on your shoulder. You jumped, startled, and were surprised to see Bruce Banner staring back at you, soft smile on his lips. 

“It’s time for his procedure. You’re welcome to watch in the observation room, if you’d like,” he said softly. This kind man was the Hulk? The world really was a strange place. 

You wanted to. Oh, how you wanted to. But you’d made a promise and you trusted Doctor Banner. You shook your head slowly as you wiped the tears from your eyes and stood a little taller. “No, I made a deal. We need to move now while Shadow is reeling,” you said, hating the words as they left your lips.

“Alright. We’ll take good care of him. I promise, Ms. (Y/L/N),” Bruce said, and you believed him. You nodded, a small smile tugging at the corner of your lips. 

“Let’s go, Shade.” 

You turned to stare at Bucky and your heart constricted painfully. Steve appeared next to you, handcuffs in hand. You held out your arms, left shoulder protesting angrily at the movement. He looked apologetic as he put them on your wrists, tight enough that you wouldn’t be able to escape them (which would have been impossible for your right hand anyway, as it was now in a splint to keep you from moving your thumb). 

You put on a bracing smile, though you knew it didn’t reach your eyes. 

“Let’s go dismantle an evil organization, shall we?” you said, tone as light as you could make it.

* * *

You slumped in your chair and stared blankly at the screen. You’d spent the last several hours hacking into Shadow servers. They’d worked fast to try and boot you from the system, but you’d been faster, opening up new access points as soon as they’d closed the last one. You knew their coding better than they did and, after hours of digging, you were fairly sure you’d gotten nearly all information relevant to current and future dastardly endeavors. 

Once Tony had assured them that he’d know immediately if you tried to pull anything, Bucky and Steve had left, realizing they were useless in this area. Steve had even convinced Bucky to let you free of the handcuffs. Even Tony had left after a while, saying he’d rather assess the information in the comfort of his own lab. You didn’t blame him. The tech lab you were in wasn’t exactly nicely furnished. It was cold and clinical, but it was better than being in the hospital room. At least you could stand up and move around. 

You were so exhausted and engrossed in your work that you didn’t hear the door open, nor did you hear someone enter the room. In your defense, he was a trained assassin who was deceptively quiet for someone of his size. 

“You’re still awake,” he said, as though he didn’t quite believe what he was seeing.

You let out a tiny squeak, completely startled. People didn’t usually get the jump on you. You stood suddenly, throwing yourself out of your chair and immediately regretted it. Your pain meds had worn off a while ago and using your left arm had sent a lance of pain through your body. 

Bucky stared at you, eyes wide at your sudden movement. You realized he was slightly crouched, ready to defend himself. You willed yourself to relax. Your instincts screamed that he was a threat; they recognized him as The Soldier. You pointedly turned your back on him, putting yourself in a vulnerable position, and sat back down in your chair, hissing at the pain moving caused you.

“Yeah, I’m awake. What about it?” you asked, tone neutral and business-like as you tapped away at the keyboard. 

“You’ve been in here for seven hours,” he said simply, taking a seat in the chair beside you. He was just out of reach and you could see him staring at you. 

Your eyes widened and you peered at the clock in the corner of the screen. It really had been seven hours. You were suddenly aware of how hungry you were and how heavy your eyelids felt. Unless you counted being passed out as sleep, you hadn’t slept in twenty-one hours. 

“Is he out of surgery yet?” you asked, glancing at Bucky out of the corner of your eye.

“Yeah, he got out a few hours ago. It went well. They’re keeping him in a medically induced coma for a while until they’re sure everything’s fine. He’s officially chip-free,” Bucky said quietly, watching you closely. 

You nodded in acknowledgement. You froze a second later when the smell hit your nose. 

“Ray’s?” you said, swiveling in your seat to look for the source, sniffing the air like a bloodhound. A pizza box sat a few feet away on a desk and you wheeled your chair over to it. You opened the box and inhaled the deep cheesy goodness. It was definitely fresh. Your stomach growled angrily and you didn’t pause to ask if you could have some before you tore off a slice and began devouring it. You were halfway through your second slice of heaven when you remembered you weren’t alone. 

You spun in your chair, pizza slice hanging from your mouth, and stared wide-eyed at Bucky, who was watching you with something akin to amusement. As soon as your gazes locked the small smile he’d been wearing slid off his face. 

You bit off the piece that was already in your mouth and chewed slowly before swallowing, eyeing him warily. 

“Hey, you brought a pizza. Can I have some?” you asked, deadpan, before taking another bite.

He scoffed and rolled his eyes. “So your love for pizza wasn’t a lie. What else was true? How much of it was fake?” he asked as he crossed his arms and leaned back in his chair. 

It was unfair how great he looked as he glared at you, icy blue eyes studying you closely. 

“You wouldn’t believe me even if I told you,” you said as you finished off the second slice and reached for a third. 

[Originally posted by gliceria](https://tmblr.co/Zspawh2GsBwAD)

“Try me,” he said, tone short. He tilted his head and you admired his long dark brown locks. You cursed yourself for getting distracted and let out a long sigh.

“Pretty much everything was true, minus what I did for a living,” you said. He let out a disbelieving laugh and you shrugged. “See, I told you you wouldn’t believe me,” you sighed. 

“And why should I? You lied to me,” he said, shrugging.

You groaned and rubbed the bridge of your nose with your right hand. “You’ve seen the chip. I bet Banner’s done blood work by now to prove we’re siblings. You saw how they defended Gabe in an attempt to keep me under Shadow’s thumb. Are you really going to keep faulting me for keeping my family safe?” you asked, good arm thrown up in exasperation. 

His jaw set and his eyes narrowed, glaring at you as he mulled your words over. You worked your way through the third slice of pizza, studying him just as closely. 

“Steve says I should forgive you,” he said quietly. 

You raised an eyebrow at him and leaned back in your chair, finishing the crust off before you spoke. “And we both know you suck at listening to other people’s advice. So, what are you gonna do?” you asked, morbidly curious about what his answer would be. If he decided he didn’t want anything to do with you you’d lose your first friend in a hundred years. If he decided to give you a second chance you knew nothing would ever be the same again; there was no going back to being James and (Y/N), normal people and best friends.

“You saved my life in the hospital today. I didn’t get a read on those agents. If you hadn’t warned me I might be dead right now,” he said slowly, expression unreadable. “You also had multiple opportunities to take me out, but you didn’t, even though you knew that if I stopped you it would result in Gabe’s death. And that was all before you knew _I_ was the Winter Soldier,” he said, staring at you as though you were a particularly difficult puzzle. There was a pause, so quiet you could hear a pin drop, before he asked you a question. One simple question. “Why?”

You laughed. It was a humorless sound, full of pain. “Because I refused to be what they wanted me to be. I resolved to never become the monster they tried to force me to be,” you said quietly, gaze locked with his. 

His eyes were a storm of emotion as he looked at you. “That’s all? That’s the only reason why you saved me today? To spite Shadow? To save your brother?” he asked quietly. 

Something in his tone broke your heart all over again. It was James in front of you, not The Soldier or Bucky Barnes. Vulnerable, easy-going, kind James who didn’t have a checkered past. The man who stopped to pet every dog in central park and picked you up coffee so you wouldn’t have to drink the hospital’s terrible gruel. The man you called your best friend.

You knew that, deep down, they were all the same person. James was who Bucky Barnes would have become if he hadn’t had all those terrible things happen to him. They were two sides of the same coin, and you realized you wanted to know The Soldier, too. 

You shook your head slowly. “No, it wasn’t,” you said simply.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: ‘I’m a superhero and you’re my arch nemesis but we don’t know each other’s identities and we’re actually best friends’
> 
> You’re best friends with Bucky, although you know him as James Ranier. He’s your best friend, too, but he has no idea you’re actually Shade, a woman who plagues the reformed Winter Soldier’s life as his arch nemesis. Your brother’s back!
> 
> A month has passed and you’ve begun to fit in with the rest of team, but Bucky’s just as distant as he was a month ago.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female!Mutant!Reader
> 
> Warnings: Violence, Swearing (always), blood, angst
> 
> A/N: Sorry for the slow update. Today was a doozy. Also, when I start writing these I don’t always know where I’m going with them. I let the characters lead me there. I… didn’t intend to write this. It just kinda happened. Sorry.
> 
> This chapter was inspired by Impossible by Shontelle.

[Originally posted by xopsychogirlxo](https://tmblr.co/Z9TeWf2NA5VFd)

**One Month Later**

“They have to let me leave at some point,” Gabe whined as he paced his room, his boredom evident. He’d collected odds and ends from his time in the compound. You’d even brought him interesting things that he’d missed being invented while he was in a coma. After a month, it was finally starting to look like a place Gabe would actually live in.

“No they don’t, Gabe,” you said, rolling your eyes at his antics. He collapsed onto his bed melodramatically, breathing a little heavily. He hadn’t quite gotten his energy back yet. He’d been in a coma for many years, after all. 

“They let _you_ out,” he said petulantly, glaring at you from his bed. 

“I don’t get winded from walking around,” you countered, smirking at him as you leaned against his bookshelf. He’d read all of the books in it at least twice but he refused to use a tablet, even after you’d explained he could read whatever he wanted on it. 

“Hey, I’m getting better by the day,” he said, but his breathy voice betrayed him.

“I know, I know. But you’re still a target for Shadow and we haven’t finished wiping them off the map yet,” you said, frowning at your own failure. In your month working with the Avengers you’d made more progress against Shadow than they had in years, but, if your data was right- and it always was- it wasn’t nearly enough. 

“Hey, you’re doing that thing where your brows get all scrunched up and you ruin that pretty face of yours,” Gabe teased, voice gentle. 

“It’s called frowning, Gabe,” you said, rolling your eyes at him.

“Oh, I know. I just don’t know why you’re doing it, is all. You’re doing some amazing things, sis,” Gabe said, smiling at you. 

You snorted bitterly. “I’m just fixing some mistakes, Gabe. It’s nothing to be proud of,” you said, arms crossed. Your left arm was still a little stiff, but your thumb had healed recently, which was nice. 

Gabe rolled his eyes. “Whatever you say, (Y/N),” he said, nonplussed. 

“Do you want anything besides some new books?” you asked as you gently shoved yourself off of the bookcase and headed towards the door. 

“Nah,” he said absently. 

“Alright. Be back soon, bro,” you said, giving him a smile as you opened the door. 

“(Y/N),” Gabe said. Something in his tone made you pause and look back at him, confusion on your face. “There is just one thing. Make him listen to you,” he said, uncharacteristically severe. 

You sighed, knowing exactly who he was talking about. “I can’t make him listen, Gabe,” you said quietly.

“Just… try, alright? Promise me that much,” he said, determined gaze trained on you.

“Alright, alright. I’ll try,” you said, if only to get him to stop staring resolute holes straight through you. 

“Be safe, sis. See you soon,” he said, his usual, easy smile returning to his face. You made a noncommittal grunt in response and shut his bedroom door behind you. 

You groaned as soon as it shut and grumbled angrily to yourself. “Yeah right… Make him listen?… Stubborn bastard… doesn’t ever listen… won’t even give me a chance…”

“What are you talking to yourself about, (Y/N)?” came a mischievous and heavily accented voice from behind you. 

You whirled, surprised, only to come to face to face with a grinning Wanda. “Jesus, Wanda, don’t sneak up on me like that,” you said, clutching your chest dramatically. 

“Like what?” came a second voice from behind you once again. You turned to look at Natasha who had an evil grin on. She definitely knew exactly what she had just done. 

“I hate both of you,” you grumbled, walking past both of them towards the elevators. 

“That’s not true,” Wanda said, smiling widely. 

You frowned. “No, it’s not,” you conceded, tone sour. 

“I’ve been getting better at sneaking up on you,” Natasha said, obviously proud. 

“I’ve always been good at it,” Wanda said, sticking her tongue playfully out at Natasha. 

“Yes, you’re both fantastically sneaky bitches. Truly, wonders of the world,” you said dryly as you pressed the button to call the elevator. 

“Damn you’re grumpy today. What’s put you in this mood?” Natasha asked, eyeing you up and down. 

“I’m nine hundred years old. I think I’m entitled to my ‘grumpy old woman’ status by now,” you said, giving Natasha a sideways look. 

“I really forget about that sometimes,” Wanda said quietly. “You really don’t seem like you’re hundreds of years old… but you’re dodging Nat’s question. What’s got you looking like you swallowed lemons?” she asked, raising an eyebrow at you. 

You sighed as you entered the elevator. “Not important,” you grumbled, knowing that they wouldn’t let it go. Still, you hoped they would. “What are you guys doing here anyway?” you asked, hoping they’d get distracted by talking about themselves.

No such luck. “Going to a debrief, now answer the question,” Natasha said dangerously.

You groaned. “Just getting off site for a while. Have some errands to run,” you said, hoping against hope that a half truth would throw them off your scent. 

“That doesn’t explain why you’re upset,” Wanda said, studying your face closely. You sincerely hoped she wasn’t reading your mind. 

You hastily stepped off of the elevator when the doors opened and headed towards where you thought _he_ might be. “Gabe tried to guilt me me into talking to _him_ ,” you said through clenched teeth. 

“Oh, that makes sense,” Wanda said, nodding slightly as she fell into step next to you. 

“Try not to destroy the base, alright?” Natasha asked, tone light. However, you knew her request was genuine. He and you had nearly wrecked a Quinjet, the entire residential level of the compound, and a handful of the organization’s vehicles during your arguments. How two [relatively] non-powered people nearly destroyed the base was beyond your teammates, who often had to step in to stop the rampages.

“No promises,” you mumbled as you turned the corner. You came to a sudden halt and Wanda ran straight into you. Natasha stopped just in time and looked past you to see what had made you freeze like a deer in the headlights. 

Steve and Bucky stood in the living area, talking quietly over cups of coffee. Something Steve had said had Bucky smiling, eyes crinkling and teeth flashing between his perfect lips. 

“Hey boys,” Natasha said in greeting. She stepped deftly around you and walked over to them, leaving you and Wanda in her wake.

Steve and Bucky looked towards the three of you and the temperature in the room immediately dropped a few degrees when Bucky saw Natasha wasn’t alone. 

Or, more specifically, when he realized you were there.

“Hey, Nat, Wanda, (Y/N),” Steve said, smiling and bravely ignoring the sudden icy atmosphere. Wanda nudged your shoulder gently as she walked into the room and you hesitantly followed after her.

“Ready for the debrief?” Natasha asked Steve sarcastically.

“Ready to sit in a room for hours while they ask us the same five questions over and over again?” Steve asked, eyebrows raised. 

“Yup. That,” Wanda said, sardonic smile on her lips. 

“Never,” Steve said sourly, grimacing. His response earned a chuckle from you, Wanda, and Nat. Bucky remained impassive, not looking at any of you. 

“We should get going. They should be expecting us any second,” Natasha said, sounding like she wanted to do anything but go to the debrief. 

“I’ll see you when you get out,” Bucky said quietly to Steve before he made a hasty retreat towards the hallway. 

“Wait, Bucky! I was wondering if you’d like to go into the city with me today?” you said quickly, knowing you’d be unable to find him and ask later if he made it out of your sights now. 

He froze, but didn’t turn around. The five of you stood there, motionless for a second, before he continued walking as though you’d never said anything. 

“Bucky, wait,” Steve said, tone gentle. Bucky stopped again, this time turning his head just enough to be able to see Steve out of the corner of his eye. “You should go, Buck. You haven’t been to the city in a while,” he said earnestly. 

You watched as they had one of their silent conversations. You and Gabe could do that, too. It was one of those things you were able to do once you knew someone for a long time. Bucky and you had started doing it before-

“Fine,” he said so quietly you weren’t sure you’d heard right at first. You stared at Bucky in surprise, only snapping out of your shock when you realized everyone was staring at you.

“Oh, uh. I’m leaving in about fifteen minutes. I’ll meet you in the garage then, if that’s alright?” you asked, tone as civil as you could manage. 

He gave a single nod to let you know he’d heard before he vanished down the hallway. 

Natasha was smiling encouragingly at you, and Wanda gave you a thumbs up. Steve, however, looked a little dubious. 

“Please don’t destroy Manhattan, alright?” he asked, tone pleading. He really thought you and Bucky could single-handedly destroy Manhattan? Maybe you didn’t give yourself enough credit. 

You groaned, rolling your eyes. “Why does everyone keep telling me not to wreck things?” you griped, throwing Natasha and Steve dirty looks.

“Maybe if you two stopped destroying things whenever you were together we’d stop worrying so much,” Wanda said placatingly. 

You wanted to argue, but you knew she was right. Instead, you smirked evilly. “Enjoy the debrief,” you taunted as you walked out of the living area, tone sickly sweet. They all groaned and you chuckled to yourself. At least being off active duty meant you didn’t have to sit through those. Maybe there was a silver lining to taking a bullet to the shoulder after all. 

* * *

Fifteen minutes later Bucky walked into the garage, baseball cap low over his brow. Like you, he was bundled up against the chilly fall weather. He was wearing his favorite jacket and his worn red henley peeked out underneath it. Luckily, it was getting colder out; His gloves attracted less attention.

You were leaning on the hood of your car. It was the gem of your collection; a Lamborghini Reventon. 

The price tag was enough to make even Tony Stark think twice about buying it (only twice, though. Of course he’d just acquire one if he really wanted it). 

Bucky spotted you immediately and raised an eyebrow in confusion. He walked over slowly, taking his sweet time. 

He looked from you to the car and back suspiciously. “Should I change? I didn’t think we’d be doing something that warranted driving a million dollar car,” he said, seeming less than thrilled by the prospect. 

“No, you’re fine,” you said, giving him a brave smile you weren’t sure you felt. “It’s 1.5 million, by the way. Would you like to drive?” you asked quietly, eyes searching his. 

He scoffed and looked away. “You don’t even let Gabriel drive this thing. Why would you let me?” he asked warily.

“Well, if I let Gabe drive it he’d escape the compound and never return. He hates being cooped up here,” you said, smiling faintly at the thought of chasing your brother down in a quinjet. The grin slid off your face after a moment. “But I’d let you drive… because I trust you,” you said, forcing the words out quickly so you couldn’t chicken out of saying them.

He looked you up and down, eyes wide as though you’d just grown another head. “Last time I drove you somewhere-” 

“I know, I know. But I trust you. And maybe, just maybe, this drive won’t end in either of us getting shot by a guy who frequently dresses like a bird?” you asked, holding the key out to him, trepidation clear in your voice. 

He seemed to deliberate for a moment before he reached out slowly and took the keys. “Do you promise not to shoot me even if I scratch it?” he asked, eyebrow raised in question. 

Your eyes widened in horror at the thought. “Please, god, don’t scratch it,” you said, suddenly regretting your decision. 

He let out a single huff of laughter and you smiled widely without realizing it. You forgot how much you missed his laugh and his smile. “Get in the car,” he said good-naturedly as he pressed the button to open the doors. They slowly opened upwards and Bucky let out a low whistle of appreciation. 

You slid into the passenger side as Bucky got in the driver’s side. The doors closed elegantly as Bucky started the car. He grinned like a kid in a candy store at the sound of the engine and admired the interior. He seemed to remember he wasn’t alone and cleared his throat in embarrassment. 

“Where to?” he asked hesitantly as he began maneuvering out of the garage. 

“The book store on Broadway,” you responded as you pulled the GPS route up on the screens. 

“Books for Gabe?” he asked quietly as he pulled out of the garage and into the light of day. 

“Yeah, he already finished the pile I bought him last week,” you said as you watched the compound pass by the windows of your car.

“That sounds about right,” he said reticently. You glanced at him out of the corner of your eye. Although he was focused on the road ahead of him, you could tell his thoughts were miles away. You decided to leave him be. This was the longest you’d gone without shouting at each other since the bitter truth had come out a month ago and you didn’t feel like breaking this new record if you could help it. 

* * *

“It’s not the most inconspicuous ride, you know,” he remarked as the doors slid shut and he locked them. “Not that I’m complaining,” he said, shrugging slightly. 

“What’s the point of having something that nice if you don’t use it?” you asked, glancing at him over your shoulder as you walked towards the book store. You’d gotten lucky on finding a parking spot, but it was still a bit of a walk. 

“I suppose you have a point.”

Huh. That was a new one. He hadn’t agreed with you in a long time. You smiled to yourself. Maybe you could salvage something here, after all. 

* * *

An hour later, you and Bucky were walking out of the bookstore, weighed down by a small library worth of books. Most of them were for Gabe, but you and Bucky had both gotten one or two for yourselves each.

“Are you sure you didn’t just ask me to come with you so I could help you carry all this shit?” Bucky asked, holding up one of the bulging, hefty bags. 

“Now why would I do that? Besides, I could carry all of this by myself,” you said, throwing a smirk Bucky’s way. 

Something caught your attention and your eyes widened in horror. A red dot was trained right at the center of his chest. Before you knew what was happening, you were in front of Bucky, arms out wide, books tumbling to the ground, pages getting soaked from the rainwater on the sidewalk. 

Everything seemed to be going in slow motion. The split second it took you to get between Bucky and the sniper’s shot felt longer than all nine hundred years of your life. Bucky’s eyes widened as he looked down at you. He realized a moment too late there was danger. 

Agony. 

It was agony.

Your breath left you in a rush as the bullet pierced your skin; as it ripped your body apart. You couldn’t tell exactly where it hit, but you knew it was bad. You should have felt more pain but it was quickly fading. 

“(Y/N)? (Y/N)!!” Bucky yelled, hands flying to your arms, eyes wide in fear and shock.

You opened your mouth to speak but no words came out. Your legs gave out and suddenly Bucky was the only thing keeping you from crashing to the ground. He lowered you slowly, cradling you in his arms. You heard him calling for help- yelling at passersby to call and ambulance- but you didn’t pay attention to that. You were busy memorizing every detail of his face. The exact shade of his eyes. The way his dark brown locks framed his handsome face. How his scruff had begun to get a little long.

You reached up slowly and placed a hand on his cheek. His gaze snapped to yours, panic clear in his eyes. You rubbed your thumb over his cheek gently and you felt a smile sneak its way onto your lips. 

You mustered some of your quickly fading energy. “I’m glad you’re safe,” you croaked out. You felt blood trickle out of your mouth, which Bucky quickly wiped away with his thumb.

“Shh, shh, (Y/N). Don’t talk-” he whispered frantically, glancing around for help. Anything at all. Anyone.

“I think you were right about the car-” you broke off. A racking cough ripped through your body and you winced. Maybe you could still feel pain, after all. “-too conspicuous,” you murmured. Your vision had begun to fade, grey and black creeping into the corners.

“Please, save your energy-” he said, clutching you tightly to his chest. All at once he scooped you up and began running. 

“Hey,” you said quietly, voice barely above a whisper. “Take care of Gabe for me, alright? He’s never been on his own before. Not really,” you said, voice getting weaker by the second. 

Were you breathing? It was hard to tell. Your body wasn’t relaying information to your brain anymore. 

“Take care of him yourself, (Y/N)!” Bucky said stubbornly, refusing to believe what was happening. 

“Y’called me by my name,” you mumbled, eyes fluttering as the world began to fade out around you. He said something again, but you couldn’t hear all of it. You thought he told you to stop talking again, but you couldn’t do that. Not yet You had one last thing to say.

“-love you, Bucky,” you hissed out, your breath a death rattle in your chest. 

If he said anything else, you didn’t hear it. With your peace said, you welcomed the darkness. Nine hundred years was more than enough for one person, after all.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: ‘I’m a superhero and you’re my arch nemesis but we don’t know each other’s identities and we’re actually best friends’ 
> 
> After the truth about your secret identities was revealed, you’ve helped the Avengers right your past wrongs, wiping your former evil organization off the map. However, Bucky never forgave you and kept his distance.
> 
> When the unthinkable happens, will Bucky have to live the rest of his life never having made peace with you?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female!Mutant!Reader
> 
> Warnings: Violence, Swearing (always), blood, angst
> 
> A/N: I know I should have posted this earlier. I just wanted to make you all sweat a little… because I’m an asshole. I actually had trouble deciding if I wanted to continue this series or leave it was it was. *Gifs not mine!*
> 
> This chapter was inspired by Stay With Me by Sam Smith.

**Steve’s POV**

“How far out are we?” Steve asked Natasha, trying his best to keep the urgency out of his tone. 

> Bucky had pressed his panic button a few minutes ago. It had taken Steve, Natasha, and Wanda mere minutes to suit up and scramble a quinjet. Bruce had joined them just as they were about to leave, saying that there were emergency medical responders on their way to the area near where Bucky’s distress beacon indicated he was. Steve had nodded in understanding and ushered him on board quickly. The second his feet hit the metal ramp it started closing. Natasha deftly maneuvered the jet out of the hangar and made a beeline for New York, likely breaking at least ten aviation codes in the process.

“They’re not far. Three minutes, maybe?” Natasha responded as she flicked a few switches. The jet lurched forward, causing Wanda and Bruce to nearly lose their footing. “Hold on tight,” she ordered belatedly. 

“Wanda, you’re going to cover the jet. Don’t let anyone get a shot at Nat or Bruce. Nat, keep the jet running. This is an extraction mission. We haven’t been notified of any huge emergency, meaning Bucky and (Y/N) were likely the only targets. In and out, quick and easy,” Steve informed them, hoping it’d be as simple as he made it sound.

“We’re coming up on their location. Get ready,” Nat said. The jet decelerated and switched to its rotors, letting it come to a horizontal stop. It lowered slowly and people and cars alike scattered. “We’re lucky they’re in a place with enough clearance,” Nat mumbled, landing skillfully in the busy New York street. 

The bay door opened and Wanda took position at the entrance, red energy dancing at her fingertips as she looked for hostiles. 

Steve had his shield in his hand, assessing the area as he ran towards his best friend. He knew something was wrong immediately. You were in Bucky’s arms, but you weren’t moving. Steve ran to the both of you, panic only growing the closer he got. That was… a lot of blood. 

**Bucky’s POV**

“What took you so long?” Bucky demanded angrily as he ran towards the jet. 

Steve hadn’t seen him this upset in a long time, maybe ever. “What happened? Where are the hostiles?” Steve asked, looking between you and Bucky as he made his way towards the jet. 

“Gone, I don’t know. That’s not important right now. Tell me you have Banner with you,” Bucky said tersely. This couldn’t be happening. He looked down at your limp form and swallowed back the bile in his throat. He couldn’t tell if you were breathing or not.

“Yeah, he’s there,” Steve informed him. He placed two fingers to the comm in his ear. “Bruce, (Y/N)’s taken a hit. Chest. It’s bad. Ready the medical supplies. Nat, call the base. Warn them we’re coming. Have a med team meet us in the hangar,” Steve ordered. Bruce appeared at the entrance of the jet next to Wanda a second later, worry clear on his face. 

Wanda looked at you in Bucky’s arm and clapped a hand over her mouth in horror. You weren’t moving and the life had drained from your face. She tried to see if you were breathing, but if you were it was so faint she couldn’t tell. 

Bucky ran up the ramp and placed you on the backboard Bruce had found, Steve hot on his heels. “We’re in, Nat. Get us out of here. Now,” Steve said, urgency clear in his voice. 

“Hold onto the backboard,” Natasha warned, rotor engines firing up and making the plane lift off before the bay door had completely shut. Bucky’s metal hand held it in place as the plane wobbled a little in air before steadying itself.

Bruce began assessing you completely and he felt dread creeping into his stomach. He couldn’t tell where the bullet had hit you and you’d lost a lot of blood. You were barely even breath-

“She’s not breathing,” Bruce said, trying to be as professional as possible, as though a friend of his wasn’t dying right in front of him. He had to keep his head if he was going to save you. 

He quickly checked for a pulse and found none. 

“CPR, now!” he ordered, turning around to attempt to find the on-board AED. 

Bucky immediately rushed to your side, kneeled down, and began performing compressions. 

“And someone get some gauze and start applying pressure to the wound!” he barked as he dug through a compartment that a sign indicated the AED would be in. 

“It’s on her back,” Bucky growled as he pumped away at your chest. 

“Of course it is,” Bruce said bitterly as he finally fished out the AED. “Keep performing compressions until I get this set up,” he said, readying the machine as quickly as he could. 

Bucky watched as Wanda used her powers to lift you up just enough to slip the gauze under you. She kept a hand on your shoulder as she worked. Red mist leaked out from under your form. “I can keep pressure this way,” she muttered, brows creased in concentration.

“We’ll be at the base in a minute,” Natasha informed them. “A medical team is on standby.”

“I don’t know if she has that long,” Bruce murmured. “Get her shirt off, now,” he yelled. Steve stepped forward and Bucky stopped compressions just long enough for Steve to quickly rip the flimsy fabric right down the middle. Bruce slapped the AED’s patches onto your body and placed a hand on Bucky’s arm. “You have to let the machine get a read, Barnes,” he said. It took every ounce of Bucky’s self control to stop. 

“I could pull the bullet out,” Wanda said tentatively, looking up at Bruce. 

“Don’t. She’ll definitely bleed out right now if you do,” Bruce warned. 

Wanda nodded and let go of you, although red mist still swirled around her fingers. She was obviously still applying pressure with the gauze to your back. It was starting to show how much of a toll this was taking on her; sweat beaded on her forehead.

“No pulse found. Recommending shock,” said the automated voice. “Deliver shock when ready.” 

“Clear,” Bruce said before pressing the button. “Delivering shock,” it droned out. 

The team waited with bated breath, but your chest didn’t rise. 

“Pulse not found. Continue compressions for thirty seconds,” the device beeped out.

“Fuck,” Bucky swore, quickly returning to his spot at your side. Wanda leaned forward again, too. It seemed it was easier for her to help you if she had physical contact. 

Natasha piped up above the din. “Thirty seconds. Have her ready to move a soon as those doors open,” she warned. Steve mumbled his acknowledgement, as did Bruce. Wanda and Bucky were too focused to even spare a nod. 

“Preparing shock, please stand back,” the AED’s monotone voice instructed. Bucky and Wanda let you go, though Bucky seemed reluctant, as though you’d vanish if he let go of you now.

“Delivering shock,” it warned. 

Everyone froze and only the sound of the quinjet’s engine filled the space as they waited for the verdict. Bucky swore he saw your chest move, but it could just as easily been his mind playing tricks on him.

“Heartbeat detected,” it stated and Bucky nearly collapsed with relief. Wanda let out a breath she didn’t know she was holding and Steve’s shoulders sagged in relief. Bruce, however, didn’t relax a bit.

“Don’t get complacent yet. She’s not safe yet. That bullet’s still in her shoulder and she lost a lot of blood. She’ll need surgery to get it out, but in her current condition-”

“Don’t say it,” Bucky growled, glaring at the doctor. “Just don’t,” he said, sounding every bit like the broken man he felt he was right then.

“Touching down in ten,” Natasha warned. Bruce quickly ripped off the AED’s pads and Steve and Bucky took position at either side of the backboard, hands clutching at the handles, eyeing you warily. 

“Whatever you do, don’t stop applying that pressure until the doctors tell you otherwise,” Bruce instructed Wanda. She nodded, sweat dripping down her face. This level of precision and sustained energy was taking a lot out of her. “You might be the only thing keeping her alive right now,” Bruce said gravely. She merely nodded, determination etched into her pretty face. 

The bay door opened while the plane was still in the air, revealing the medical team Natasha had mentioned. The plane jostled slightly as it touched down, but Steve and Bucky were already carrying you down the ramp, Wanda by your side, hand placed gently on your shoulder. 

Bucky and Steve brought you to the proper gurney the med team brought with them. Bucky lifted you from the backboard to the bed with a gentleness that surprised even Steve. The medical team began immediately pushing you to an operating room. One of the staff talked hurriedly with Bruce, who told them as much about your condition as he could. Bucky didn’t like the look on the doctor’s face. He may not be a medical professional, but he’d seen a lot of wounds in his day. The fact they got you breathing was a miracle in and of itself. 

The compound passed by in a blur. Luckily, the med ward was on the same level as the hangar; that was likely on purpose for cases just like this one, and Bucky was thankful for that design insight at this exact moment. Every second counted. 

“You have to wait out here,” a nurse said shortly, but not unkindly, placing a hand on Bucky’s chest. He hadn’t even realized they’d already arrived in the ward and were at the doors of one of the operating rooms. She had a job to do and Bucky was in the way. 

He watched as you disappeared through the doors on the gurney. Everything inside of him told him to follow you, but he knew he couldn’t. 

Steve laid a gentle hand on Bucky’s shoulder and his gaze snapped to Steve’s. Steve’s heart twisted in his chest. His friend looked so lost. His arms were covered in your blood all the way up to his biceps and his haunted gaze seem to go right through Steve. 

“She jumped in front of the shot. It was meant for me, Steve,” he murmured, eyes flicking back to the door. He stared at the doorway in dumbfounded shock and Steve didn’t know what to do. What could he even say to comfort his friend in this kind of situation?

“Why would-” Bucky began, but his voice died in his throat. He knew why. You’d said as much when you were bleeding out in his arms, hadn’t you?

“You motherfucker!” came an angry voice from down the hallway. Steve and Bucky’s gazes snapped to the source and Steve’s stomach plummeted to his feet. 

An angry Gabriel was barreling down the hallway with murder in his eyes, a distressed Sam hot on his heels. 

Bucky watched with a sort of detached dread as Gabe launched himself at him. Bucky was at least a head taller than Gabe and probably weighed twice as much, but Gabe didn’t care. All he seemed to care about was trying to beat Bucky to a pulp. 

Bucky didn’t attempt to stop him. He deserved it, after all.

To Bucky and Gabe’s surprise, Steve held a hand out, stopping Gabe just out of arm’s reach of Bucky.

“You didn’t protect her! I know you two had your issues, but how could you let her get hurt like that?!” Gabe screamed, rage clear on his face. 

Bucky’s gaze slid from Gabe to the ground, unable to look him in the eye. It _was_ his fault. It was _his_ fault your life hung in the balance. The guilt ate away at him, gnawing at his gut until he was sure he’d be sick. 

He didn’t see the punch coming but he definitely felt it when it connected with his jaw. It didn’t hurt, per say. Bucky had taken worse hits this week alone. His head whipped to the side with the force though, and he hung his head. 

“If she dies I’ll kill you myself,” Gabe threatened, voice low, bitterness and anger apparent. 

Steve spoke up at that, unable to stand by as his friend was threatened so clearly. “Bucky’s not the one we should be angry at,” Steve said, pushing Gabe gently but firmly away from Bucky. “He’s not the one who shot (Y/N),” he said, trying his best to reason with Gabe. 

Gabe scowled at the Captain, his tone bitter when he spoke. “And how would you know that? He hasn’t even told us what happened! They fight all the time! And to think I actually told her to try and get along with-” 

Bucky’s eyes locked onto Gabe, panic temporarily snapping him out of his shell-shocked state. “I didn’t hurt her. I couldn’t- I could never-” his voice died as he once again realized what exactly had happened just a short while ago. It felt like hours, days, maybe even weeks ago. 

The tension was broken slightly as Wanda exited the operating room, gaze a million miles away. The guys all stared at her, speechless. None of them wanted to ask

“Wanda?” Sam asked tentatively, question implied in his tone. He seemed to be the only one who could find their voice.

She looked up slowly, glancing between all of them before she seemed to remember where she was. After a second her gaze settled on Gabe. She opened her mouth to speak, but nothing came out. She tried again, frown etching even more deeply into her face.

“She- uh. She was stable for a bit, but then- They asked me to release the pressure so they could go in and get the bullet-” she mumbled, playing with the sleeve of her shirt. She stopped when she realized your blood soaked it and she visibly balked. “Her heart stopped beating and they told me to get out- that I’d done all I could do, so-” she motioned to the doors behind her absently. Tears began to run silently down her cheeks, but she didn’t seem to notice. Gabe sunk to the floor, looking utterly defeated. Tears wouldn’t even come for him, so great was the shock.

They stood there, stunned speechless, so it wasn’t a surprise that a few of them jumped when a nurse burst through the doors. She looked around wildly between the assembled faces before she spotted Gabe.

“Gabe!” she exclaimed, yanking him up quickly. 

His managed to see through the fog that was clouding his mind as he focused in on her. “Claire…?” he asked, confusion clear on his face. 

“Do you have the same blood type as your sister? Same powers, too?” she asked, urgency clear in her voice. 

Gabe nodded his head quickly but minutely. They could see him connecting the dots. If she was asking Gabe about his blood, that means she needed it, which meant… (Y/N) still had a chance. The doctors hadn’t given up yet and neither  had you. Hope sparked in his eyes, but they could all tell that hoping hurt him nearly as much as the thought of you being dead had.

“Good. You’re coming with me. Now. I hope you aren’t afraid of needles,” she said ominously, dragging him through the doors. 

The thought that you were still alive seemed to give the others enough courage to speak. 

Steve was about to ask about what happened when Natasha came around the corner, heels clicking dangerously on the white marble floor. She marched straight up to Bucky and gathered up a handful of his shirt in her fist, jerking him sharply down to her eye level.

“What the hell happened, Barnes,” she hissed. 

“Nat, let him go. Can’t you see-” Steve began, hands up in a placating manner… and also so that he could pull Natasha off of Bucky at a moment’s notice if he needed to. You and Natasha had gotten along quickly and famously. Out of everyone in the compound, Natasha was who you were closest to, second only to your brother. 

“Yeah, I know, Steve,” she said, tone only slightly softer than it had been a moment before. “Tell us what happened, Barnes,” she demanded. 

He gulped and nodded, once again swallowing back the bile in his throat.

“We took the Lamborghini into town. Must have attracted attention because Shadow found us. We stopped at the bookstore in Manhattan- the one she likes- and then we left…” he trailed off, the horrible chain of events replaying itself in his head with gruesome clarity. 

“What happened next, Buck?” Steve asked gently, laying a hand on his shoulder. Natasha shot Steve an unreadable look but her gaze snapped back to Bucky when he continued speaking.

“Sniper. Didn’t spot him. (Y/N), though… she saw it and tried to push me out of the way, ended up getting hit in my place,” he said, voice detached. It was like he was giving a mission report, which, he realized, was the only way he’d be able to talk about it any time soon. “Sniper took off as soon as he failed. Probably thought I’d come after him,” Bucky finished, staring right through Natasha. 

“It’s not your fault, Buck,” Steve said, heart breaking for his friend. Natasha released him, looking lost. 

“Yeah it is, Steve. I should have seen him-” 

“It’s not your fault, man,” Sam said quietly in a rare show of solidarity with Bucky. Bucky knew about Sam’s history; about how he lost his wingman on a mission. Bucky knew Steve had gone through the same feelings when Bucky had fallen off the train all those years ago. 

Even with them telling him it wasn’t his fault, you could still die today and he would blame himself until the day he died, too.

Instead of saying all of that, he simply nodded, eyes glued to the ground. 

“What’s her condition?” Natasha asked, voice tight. She read the faces in the room and knew it wouldn’t be good.

“We’re not sure,” Steve said, slumping down in one of the white padded benches in the hallway. He rested his elbows on his knees and buried his face in his hands. Sam and Wanda sat down next to him, leaving Bucky and Natasha standing. “Wanda was the last to see her, and… it wasn’t good. But one of the nurses just came out and grabbed Gabe to donate some blood, so I’d wager she’s putting up a fight,” Steve said, glancing up at Natasha, grim expression on his face.

“She’ll pull through,” Natasha swore. Her voice wavered and it was clear to everyone that she’d said it because she wanted to believe it; she _had_ to believe it.

Still, her words stirred something inside of Bucky, who finally looked up from the ground, nodding his head ever so slightly. “She can do it,” he murmured, staring at the door, the rest of his body frozen in place. 

* * *

[Originally posted by messedandfucked](https://tmblr.co/ZuQT1k1u7IZGK)

Time passed agonizingly slowly. Gabe had been shuffled out a short while after he’d gone in, granola bar forgotten in his hand, a bandaid over where they’d taken blood. Nurse Temple had made them all promise to keep an eye on Gabe then quickly disappeared back inside. They asked him about your condition, but he hadn’t seen you. He could hear the doctors working in the other room and asked Claire about your condition but she merely shook her head and muttered, “I won’t lie to you, Gabe. It’s bad,” right before she stabbed him in the arm with a needle. 

It had been hours since Gabe had exited the room. Steve had told Gabe what had happened to put you in this situation and he’d since stopped glaring daggers at Bucky. Nurses and doctors came and went. The ones who left looked dead on their feet. They were obviously doing their best to save you. 

Six and a half hours later, Bruce exited the room. Steve nudged Wanda gently awake- she’d fallen asleep on his shoulder- and Natasha instantly pounced on him, asking him questions about your condition, to which he let out a long sigh. 

Everyone held their breath. One could hear a mouse sneeze with how quiet the hallway was just then.

“She’s stable, for now,” Bruce said. They all let out a collective sigh and Bucky collapsed onto one of the benches, head in his hands. “She was in and out for a while. We can’t be sure if there’s any lasting damage because of that. We… almost called it a few times, but according to Nurse Temple and Gabriel, any damage should eventually be repaired thanks to her genetic coding,” Bruce explained. “We’re keeping her sedated and under constant watch until her condition improves. I think the worst of it has passed, but she’s not out of the woods yet,” he said solemnly. 

“Thank you, Doctor Banner,” Gabe said quietly, throwing the doctor a small smile which Bruce returned. 

“Thank Claire, not me. It was her idea to use your blood. We couldn’t figure out why her body was rejecting the other blood. She’s the reason your sister’s alive right now. Her, and the other doctors who worked tirelessly to stabilize her,” he said softly, placing a hand on Gabe’s shoulder.

“I’ll be sure to thank all of them,” Gabe said, smiling in earnest now. 

“We should all get some sleep. It’s been a long day,” Steve said, glancing at Bucky and Gabe who looked like they were about to pass out. It seemed like they were about to protest, but Bruce spoke up again.

“That’s probably a good idea. It might be a while before she’s stable enough to be woken up. Waiting here won’t do her any good,” he said kindly, giving Bucky and Gabe understanding smiles.

“Will we be notified when she wakes up?” Gabe asked. From the look in Bucky’s eyes everyone could tell he was wondering the same thing. 

“Yes, but she won’t be able to have visitors immediately,” Bruce said apologetically. No one looked happy at that piece of news, but they all seemed to accept Bruce’s medical opinion without question.

Claire walked out of the operating room, hair messy and bags under her eyes and was shocked to see them all still waiting there.

“What are you all still doing here? Go get some sleep!” she ordered, shooing them all away. Most of the team got up and headed towards the residential level. Bucky stopped long enough to thank Claire and Bruce before Steve tugged him down the hallway. “Idiots,” she mumbled, fondness clear in her voice.

Gabe threw his arms around Claire and thanked her profusely and turned to leave, but Claire stopped him.

“No, not you, mister. You have some explaining to do,” she said dangerously, hand on her hip. 

Bucky couldn’t help but overhear their conversation as he walked away. Super soldier hearing and what not. Steve was too engrossed in his conversation with Natasha to notice.

“If this is what I think it’s about, I want to be there, too” he heard Bruce say. 

There was a pause before Gabe spoke. “Alright, but not here,” he whispered. It was obvious from his tone he didn’t want to talk about whatever they wanted to talk about… which meant Bucky was going to find out what that something was.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: ‘I’m a superhero and you’re my arch nemesis but we don’t know each other’s identities and we’re actually best friends’
> 
> After the truth about your secret identities was revealed, you’ve helped the Avengers right your past wrongs, wiping your former evil organization off the map. The team is left reeling after you nearly die and Gabe hides a dangerous secret.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female!Mutant!Reader
> 
> Warnings: Violence, Swearing (always), blood, angst
> 
> A/N: The first part of this chapter focuses very heavily on Gabe (and, by association, you). Bear with me here. Also, #40s slang. Steve and Bucky are a buncha old farts. Also, you can bet drunk Bucky and Steve went out and played pranks. Really dumb, harmless pranks.
> 
> This chapter was inspired by Ain’t No Sunshine When She’s Gone by Bill Withers.

[Originally posted by coporolight](https://tmblr.co/ZGdvUy2KEwfYy)

“FRIDAY, get me eyes and ears on conference room A12,” Bucky said into the headset. Steve had dropped him off at his room a few minutes ago and since then Bucky had washed his arms, changed his clothes, and grabbed the tablet computer from his desk. 

“Surveillance of conference rooms is forbidden, Sergeant Barnes,” said the AI through the headset. 

“Avengers Override Code: Winter,” Bucky said shortly as he settled down into his favorite chair.

“Understood, Sergeant Barnes. Pulling up surveillance now,” FRIDAY chirped back. A second later the tablet’s screen blinked to life and on it was Bruce, Claire, and Gabriel. Gabe was standing beside the large, round conference table and Bruce and Claire were sitting. Bucky couldn’t see their faces, but their tones said enough to make up for it.

“That’s impossible,” Claire said, sounding dismissive.

“You’ve seen the bloodwork, Claire. You, too, Dr. Banner. I know you, Bruce, have studied our genetic code in particular detail. I haven’t gotten my degree in all fields of biology yet, but even I know it’s true,” Gabe said matter-of-factly.

“Oh, come on. You’re telling me you’re the fountain of youth? That’s crazy, even by my standards. Not new, but definitely crazy,” Claire said, leaning back in her chair as she threw her hands up in exasperation. 

“Well, the stories of the fountain of youth actually first appeared around the 5th century AD, so that one actually isn’t us,” Gabe said, smirking a little at his own joke. “And as for whether or not our DNA can lengthen the lives of others, well-”

“It’d kill most people,” Bruce interrupted, looking up from his hands as he left his reverie. “I did a lot of tests on human blood with your blood and each time yours overtook it and killed the human cells. I concluded from my work that any attempt to gain immortality using your blood would effectively kill any person who tried the transfusion,” Bruce said as he stared at Gabe.

“Your blood would burn them from the inside out,” Claire said as she leaned forward in her chair, lost deep in thought.

“Essentially, yes. People without enhanced DNA- even some _with_ enhanced DNA- likely wouldn’t survive the process,” Gabe said, gaze a million miles away.

Bruce’s brows furrowed as he spoke, “It did change the cells, though, before they were destroyed. They took your genetic code and started working like your cells do, before-”

“I know what you’re thinking, Bruce. We tried, y’know. A few times in fact, over the years. We’ve found people we didn’t want to lose; tried to give them a part of our power… Our parents were the first,” he said bitterly as he started at the ground. “We loved them. They were our everything. Then, one day we noticed we’d stopped aging. Our parents weren’t afraid. They loved us despite our abilities- said we were gifts from the gods. I don’t even know who had the idea originally anymore. It could have been me, or (Y/N), or our parents. Either way, we were convinced our blood held the key. 

“So our parents drank it. 

“And then they died, horribly, in pain. Their internal organs turning to goo while their brain worked so hard it burned itself out. We couldn’t do anything but watch in horror. 

And that was how our village found us. Next to our parents’ corpses, bleeding from all orifices, when they’d been healthy and happy that morning. (Y/N) and I barely escaped with our lives and have been hiding our true nature ever since. Nine hundred years of running,” he whispered, thoughts hundreds of years away. 

“Gabe, I had no idea-” Claire whispered, distraught.

“I’m sorry, Gabe. I really am, but we could study your DNA and find a way to-” Bruce was cut off by a sharp look from Gabe.

“I know what you’re about to ask, Dr. Banner. You want to use my DNA- or my sister’s- to find a cure to aging; to disease. My answer is no,” he said coldly. 

“Gabriel, this could save so many-” Bruce beseeched, but was once again cut off by Gabe. 

“No, Dr. Banner. People aren’t meant to live forever. Surely you could see the certain outcome of making everyone on earth effectively immortal?” Gabe asked, tone more clinical and frigid than any of them had ever heard it. 

Bruce didn’t look happy, but he didn’t speak again. Claire watched Gabe with rapt attention as though he was a piece of a particularly interesting puzzle.

“People won’t give up their more base desires. Sure, people can always die suddenly in accidents, but they won’t give up the chance for families; to satisfy that insatiable itch. No, the human population would grow out of control,” Gabe said, voice finally breaking. “I wish I could, Dr. Banner. I really, really do. I’ve dedicated my long, long life to helping people, but this is the one thing I can’t give, for their own good,” he said, his pain over the dilemma clear in his voice. 

“You didn’t give into those desires, though,” Claire said, staring hard at Gabe. “Maybe-”

“You’re wrong,” Gabe said so quietly Bucky barely heard it.

“What?” Claire asked, dumbfounded. 

“You’re wrong. I gave in. A few times, in fact. You think my long life makes me suddenly not want romantic human companionship? Children? I’ll always love my sister, but she can’t provide those for me,” he said sadly.

Claire stared at him, suddenly confused. “You mean there are others? Like you? Your children?” she asked, eyes widening at the possibility.

Gabriel shook his head. “No, they didn’t inherit my gift. My first son died in 1357, my first daughter died in 1362. My second son died in 1579, my third in 1702. My last child, my daughter, died in 1723. All human. I realized, though, that my… other bodily fluids had the same effect that my blood did, they just reacted at a slower rate. The kids weren’t effected, but their mothers… my loves… they eventually succumbed to it. I stopped taking lovers after I’d realized, but it was too little too late,” he said bitterly, hatred for himself showing clearly in his tone.

The realization seemed to hit Claire the same time it hit Bucky. “What about (Y/N)?” she asked numbly, almost scared of his answer. 

“What about her?” Gabe asked, though everyone could tell he knew what she was about to ask.

“Did she ever… have kids? Lovers?” Claire asked tentatively. 

Bucky didn’t notice how tense he was until he realized he’d cracked the armrest of the chair he was sitting in with his metal hand. He let out the breath he didn’t realize he’d been holding and forced himself to breathe evenly.

Gabe shook his head slowly. “She had a few trysts over the years, but… she refused to get attached to people. She didn’t want to settle down. She said she wasn’t as compassionate as I was, but I disagree. I think she cares about people too much, and it hurts her too deeply when they leave her,” he said quietly, head tilted slightly to the side as he thought. 

“That’s… a lonely life,” Bruce said quietly as he crossed his arms. 

“It can be. That’s why I tried so hard to push her to fix things with Sergeant Barnes. She rarely lets others in. I didn’t wish for her to lose that relationship,” Gabe said, melancholy. 

Bucky’s heart was racing. He’d really screwed up, hadn’t he? He stood and began pacing. Would he ever get the chance to fix things with you? Would you wake up? Gabe and Claire seemed optimistic that you’d eventually recover if given enough time, but they weren’t sure. What if your heart just… gave out and they couldn’t resuscitate you? 

Would he ever get a chance to respond to your last words?

“I’m sorry I can’t be of more help,” Gabe said sadly as he made his way towards the door, leaving Bruce, Claire and (unknowingly) Bucky a shocked mess in his wake. 

* * *

[Originally posted by stevesupallnighttogetbucky](https://tmblr.co/Z9eC-h21bFuPi)

Bucky burst into Steve’s room, eyes wide. Steve snapped instantly awake, sitting up quickly to find the source of the noise. 

When Steve realized it was Bucky he relaxed only slightly “What’s goin’ on, Buck?” Steve asked warily. This was unusual behavior for Bucky and he hoped it wasn’t anything serious. 

“I messed up, Stevie,” Bucky said emotionally as he shut Steve’s door behind him. 

“What are you talking about?” Steve asked, still on alert. 

“(Y/N),” Bucky said simply. 

“What happened? Did her condition-” Steve began, alarmed.

“No, no. This isn’t about her current condition. This is about- about how badly I’ve been treating her and… what she said before she lost consciousness,” Bucky said, guilt punching him in the gut. 

Steve seemed to realize that his friend needed to talk this out because he sighed and got up from the bed, stretching. “Let’s get some tea and talk this out, Buck,” Steve said, yawning as he pulled on a pair of lounge pants. 

“May need to break into the Asgardian booze for this one, Stevie,” Bucky said, frown etched deep into his face. Steve looked him up and down, eyebrow raised. 

“I thought we were saving that for the Christmas party?” Steve asked suspiciously. 

“I’m sure Thor can bring more hooch with him,” Bucky said dismissively. 

Steve let out a deep sigh before nodding. “Alright, Buck. Whatever you say.” 

* * *

Ten minutes later they were back in Steve’s room, Asgardian liquor in glasses that were clutched tightly in hand, bottle tucked securely under Steve’s arm. 

Steve sat down on his bed and Bucky pulled up a chair, sitting down none-too-gently. They gave each other commiserating looks as they clinked their glasses together in an informal toast. They both took the shot, grimacing slightly as it burned down their throats. 

“Damn, the Asgardians really know their liquor,” Bucky hissed, shooting the bottle an appreciative look as Steve refilled their glasses. 

“Gonna tell me why you barged into my room at 3 AM?” Steve asked conversationally as he took another tentative sip of the alcohol. 

Bucky seemed to deflate at the question and took a large sip from his glass. 

Steve gave his friend a gentle nudge to the knee with his foot, drawing his gaze up from the floor and back into the present. “C’mon, Bucky. You can tell me,” Steve said earnestly. 

“It’s bad business, Steve,” Bucky said quietly, to which Steve shrugged.

“I think I can handle it, Buck,” Steve said, giving his friend an encouraging smile. 

Bucky let out a despondent sigh, swallowing the rest of the liquid in his glass before he spoke. “I was stuck on her, Steve. (Y/N). Before I knew…” he trailed off.

“I know. I’ve known for a while,” Steve said guiltily. Bucky looked up at him, surprised, and Steve shrugged sheepishly. “It was obvious to me. I figured it was only a matter of time until the truth was smoked out,” Steve said, grinning broadly. “The grandstandin’ kinda gave it away, too. You have no idea what you looked like when you were talkin’ about her, you know.”

“Alright, alright. Are you done raggin’ on me yet?” Bucky said, pouring himself another shot of liquor. Steve finished his shot and did the same. 

“Me raggin’ on you? Never,” Steve said, sounding scandalized.

“Punk,” Bucky said, small smile playing on his lips.

“Jerk,” Steve responded instantly, easy smile on his lips. He didn’t see Bucky like this very often, but it had happened a lot while you and Bucky were friends. He’d missed this side of him; it’d been nearly nonexistent in the past month. Years of work had been undone in a single moment. “I doubt that’s all you wanted to talk about,” Steve said perceptively, eyeing Bucky over his glass.

Bucky clammed up again, lips sealed tightly. 

“C’mon, Buck. Don’t make me put you through the wringer,” Steve threatened good-naturedly. 

Bucky smirked at that. “I’d like to see you try,” he said, taking a sip of the liquor. He already was feeling its effects and was thankful he’d sprung for it. It made his next words easier. “I’ve been a damned creep, Steve. I- well, honestly, I eavesdropped on Gabe earlier-” he shrugged at Steve’s incredulous expression and continued, “-(Y/N)… she doesn’t get close to many people, y’know? Gabe said it was because she cares about people too much, which I can understand… I think we both get that. It hurts when you see all the people you care about die, but you’re still alive and kickin’,” he said sadly, thinking about all the people he’d never see again. 

Steve nodded, understanding completely. “What else, Buck?” he said encouragingly. 

“I took her for granted. I didn’t look past her involvement in Shadow to the person underneath. Didn’t even bother to try,” he said, angry at himself. “All I saw was another lie in my sorry excuse for a life. I didn’t want more of that, but… I should have considered her side, too. And I just… didn’t,” he finished lamely, downing his shot quickly. “Pour yourself one for this next part, too, Stevie,” he warned, holding his glass out for Steve to refill.

Steve threw back the rest of his his drink hesitantly then refilled both glasses. They toasted again and Bucky threw his back all at once, but Steve decided to sip on his instead. The last few Stark parties had given him a healthy fear of the Asgardian liquor. 

It turned out to be a mistake, because at Bucky’s next words, he nearly choked on the liquid.

“She told me she loved me right before she lost consciousness,” he said quickly, almost as though he hoped Steve might not hear it if he said it fast enough.

“What?” he coughed, trying to clear his lungs of the burning liquor. Bucky gave Steve a concerned look and thumped him on the back a few times until he was sure Steve was able to breathe again. 

“You heard me, punk,” Bucky said obstinately, not willing to repeat himself. 

“And are your feelings regarding that proclamation the reason why we’re drinking in my room at 3 am?” Steve asked, voice a little hoarse from coughing so hard. 

Bucky nodded absently, and Steve broke out into a wide smile. “You feel the same way, don’t you?” he asked quietly. Bucky’s gaze snapped to his and he did a perfect imitation of a deer trapped in the headlights. 

“I’m happy for you, Bucky,” Steve said sincerely, happily throwing back the alcohol now that he had something to celebrate. 

“I don’t know why you’re drinking to that,” Bucky said grumpily, setting his glass down on the ground now that the walls had started spinning. 

“Bucky, you’ve never liked a dame for more than a week or so. I think your longest relationship lasted two months,” Steve said accusingly. “And you’ve been sticking around (Y/N) for… how long now? Close to a year?” he asked, trying to count the time through the fog in his brain. 

“I wasn’t dating her during that time, Steve. She was just my friend. Doesn’t count,” Bucky said defensively. He could hold down a relationship if he wanted to… right?

“And how many female friends did you have before (Y/N)? And I’m not talking about the share crops you brought home,” Steve said challengingly. 

“Those were perfectly kind, respectable women, thank you very much,” Bucky mumbled half-heartedly. 

“Alright, alright. But you could hardly call them friends,” Steve said, words running together slightly as the liquor began to take effect. 

“Fine, you win. You’re right. Happy now?” Bucky asked, glaring unenthusiastically at Steve. 

“I’m happy if you’re happy, buddy,” Steve said easily, dopey smile on his face. 

Bucky let out a small sigh and envisioned you hooked up to machines- hurt from saving him. “I’m gettin’ there, Steve. I’m gettin’ there…” he mumbled.

Steve gave his friend an understanding smile. “She’ll wake up, Buck. She’s strong. Strong enough to kick _our_ asses,” he said, chuckling slightly at the thought. His weak jab earned a small smile from Bucky. 

“I hope so, pal,” he said quietly. 

“Hey Buck?” 

“Mm?” was all Bucky could manage, drunkenly lost in thought as he was. 

“We drank through the entire bottle,” Steve said despondently as he turned the bottle upside down. A single drop fell out and splattered pathetically onto the hardwood floor. Steve and Bucky looked at each other for a moment before they both broke out into raucous laughter; the kind of unbridled, joyful laughter that only two very, very sauced people could share.

[Originally posted by skylerlockerbie](https://tmblr.co/ZZBZUs22NPw_4)

 

 


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: ‘I’m a superhero and you’re my arch nemesis but we don’t know each other’s identities and we’re actually best friends’
> 
> After the truth about your secret identities was revealed, you’ve helped the Avengers right your past wrongs, wiping your former evil organization off the map. Bucky’s made his choice. What will yours be?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female!Mutant!Reader
> 
> Warnings: Violence, Swearing (always), blood, angst
> 
> A/N: Thank you, everyone, for going on this journey with me. I hoped you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it.
> 
> This chapter was inspired by You Make Me Feel So Young by Frank Sinatra.

[Originally posted by srogersxbbarnes](https://tmblr.co/ZJbdjg28wGWii)

**One Week Later**

“She’s waking up, Buck,” Steve said through Bucky’s bedroom door. 

Bucky nearly tripped over his various belongings scattered on the floor as he sprinted to the door and wrenched it open. 

“(Y/N)’s awake?” he asked, frantic.

“They’re waking her up now,” Steve said calmly, eyeing his friend up and down warily. “But, Buck-”

“I’ll be out in a sec,” he mumbled, slamming the door directly in Steve’s face, mid-sentence.

He ran to his dresser and threw on some fresh clothes, thanking his lucky stars he’d already showered after training. He didn’t want to smell like a wildebeest for his first interaction with you after your accident. He glanced in the mirror, running his fingers through his newly cut hair self-consciously. 

“Buck, there’s something you should know-” Steve said through the doorway.

Bucky opened the door to his room again, coming face to face with Steve, who hadn’t appeared to have moved an inch. 

“Can it wait, Steve?” Bucky asked impatiently as he glanced down the hallways past Steve.

“No, Buck. It can’t,” Steve said grimly. Bucky finally looked at his friend and immediately felt a sense of dread seep into his stomach. 

“What is it?” he ask, trepidation clear in his voice.

“The doctors… aren’t sure if all of her memories will return and it’d be bad if…” Steve motioned helplessly to Bucky’s metal arm. “If things don’t come back in the right order… things might get messy, and we don’t want to stress her out or, worse, have her hurt herself now that she’s finally on the mend,” Steve said apologetically.

Bucky’s face fell. “You mean I can’t see her?” 

Steve shook his head slowly. “At first, only Gabe is going to be allowed in. We’re hoping he’ll smooth things over if there are gaps in her memory,” Steve explained. 

“And if her memories are all in tact?” Bucky asked, a glimmer of hope clear in his voice. 

Steve’s frown deepened. “I’m… really sorry, Buck. The doctors insist on not letting anyone besides Gabe visit her today,” he said, hating how the light went out a little behind Bucky’s eyes. “The team is gonna sit in on the live feed. You’re welcome to join us.”

Bucky steeled himself and nodded. He needed to see your interactions with Gabe; He needed to know how much you remembered. 

“Alright, let’s hurry. Most of the team is already in the lounge,” Steve said, finally standing aside to let Bucky pass. 

They arrived in the lounge a few minutes later. Wanda and Vision were chatting quietly on one of the couches, Wanda perched carefully on his lap. Natasha and Sam were sitting at the bar, talking animatedly over a tablet, drinks in hand. Bruce was absent, and Bucky assumed he was in the med ward, likely looking over (Y/N)’s health. 

Natasha spotted them and paused her conversation with Sam before she sauntered over, second tablet computer in hand. “I set this up for you two, seeing as how you’re both technologically impaired fossils,” she said teasingly. 

“Hey, don’t lump me together with him,” Bucky teased, weak smile on his face. 

“Hey, I’m not _that_ bad. I’ve already learned how to use smart phones to make video calls,” Steve said defensively, earning a small chuckle from Natasha, who shook her head at his ineptitude. 

“Anyway, it looks like it’s starting,” Natasha said, nodding her head at the tablet. 

Sure enough, Gabe had entered your hospital room. It seemed like he was going to be the only one in there, which was likely for the best. 

Steve and Bucky took a seat at one of the couches, giving casual hellos to Vision and Wanda, the bulk of their attention focused on the screen. 

“(Y/N)?” Gabe asked, voice slightly distorted over the surveillance system. 

Bucky sighed out in relief when you stirred, blinking without seeing before you jolted into awareness.

“Hey, hey. Sis. It’s alright. You’re safe. Calm down. It’s alright,” Gabe said placatingly, pressing you firmly back down into the mattress. “Try not to move too much,” he instructed.

“Water” you hissed out, unable to summon your voice. 

“Here,” Gabe said, handing you the full glass from your bedside table. He lifted it to your lips and you downed the entire thing in seconds. 

“Now, the damage was really severe, and since you’re not freaking out right now, I can assume you remember-” 

“Where is he?” you asked hoarsely. 

Gabe gave you a confused look. Bucky’s heart beat faster in his chest, and Steve gave him a sideways look. 

“Who?” Gabe asked gently. 

“Bucky,” you said like it was the most obvious thing in the world. 

Everyone in the lounge simultaneously turned and looked at Bucky, their reactions ranging from surprise to dumbfounded shock to- in Nat’s case- knowing smirks. Bucky, however, looked the most stupefied of all. He stared down at the tablet, barely daring to believe his own ears.

“I can tell you about him later, but we really need to get an idea of-” Gabe began, trying to stick to the plan of figuring out what you remembered.

“Is he safe?” you asked, refusing to be taken off topic, concern clear in your voice. 

The team was looking between Bucky and the screens, trying to figure out exactly what was going on. Bucky was oblivious to the world, but Steve was wearing a proud smile as he watched his friend. Bucky was starting to think that _maybe_ he wasn’t dreaming.

Gabe let out a defeated sigh, hanging his head. Then, he looked up, small lopsided grin on his face. “Yeah, he’s safe, unharmed, but-”

“I want to see him,” you said obstinately, glaring at your brother. 

Bucky was up in a flash, ignoring the cheers and good-natured jeers from his teammates, and made his way to the elevators. 

**Your POV**

“(Y/N), it’s not up to me,” Gabe said sadly, reaching out to hold your hand. “The doctors don’t want to stress you out,” he explained. 

But you wouldn’t be dissuaded. “ _You’re_ stressing me out, Gabe,” you said bluntly as you squeezed his hand affectionately, your actions betraying your words. 

Gabe chuckled, bringing your knuckles to his lips. “I’m glad you’re awake, Sis. And… as for your James, if I know him at all- and I think I do, just a bit- they won’t be able to-”

He was interrupted by Bucky bursting into your hospital room, eyes wild, newly cut hair tousled. 

“Ah, right on time,” Gabe said happily, throwing Bucky a wink as he laid your hand gently back down on the bed. He stood, blew you a kiss, and patted Bucky on the shoulder as he left. “Go get her, Romeo,” he teased, winking at the super soldier who spared him only a glance, eyes glued to you. You were vaguely aware of Gabe shooing away your doctors before he closed your room’s doors.

Bucky seemed to be frozen in place, so you gave him a tentative smile. “Hey, stranger.”

He seemed to come back to life and walked forward slowly, taking a seat in the chair Gabe had just vacated. “Hey,” he said quietly as he looked you up and down, gaze lingering on where he knew the bullet had been lodged inside of you.

“I’m glad you’re safe,” you said, small, tender smile sneaking its way onto your lips. 

Bucky frowned. “You were reckless. It nearly got you killed,” he chastised, trying to hold back the flood of emotions he wasn’t used to feeling- not since he became the Soldier. 

You frowned, not liking the turn the conversation had taken. “I saved your life. And I’d do it all over again if-”

“Don’t” Bucky said tersely. 

“It’s the truth! I don’t regret-”

“Do you know how I would feel if you died protectin’ me?” he asked, blue eyes searching yours. 

You were shocked speechless. You hadn’t expected that. You never thought-

“I wouldn’t be able to live with myself, Doll,” he whispered, taking your hand in his. “Do you remember what you said to me? Right before you passed out?” he asked quietly. If you denied remembering he wasn’t sure what he’d do. 

To his immense relief and joy, you nodded, hesitation etched into your expression. He leaned forward and cupped your cheek in his hand, blue-grey eyes beseeching you. 

“Say it again. Please, say it again,” he whispered as he ran a thumb over your cheek gently. 

A single tear ran down your cheek which he quickly wiped away and you couldn’t help the small sob that escaped your throat. You wished you could hide, but you had nowhere to run. You didn’t want to get hurt… but you wanted something even more than that. 

“I love you,” you murmured, smile working its way back onto your face. 

Bucky stood quickly and his soft lips were on yours a second later, melding perfectly together. The kiss stole your breath and your heart sang. It was everything you’d ever hoped it would be and more. 

It was over too soon, but his next words and the smile that accompanied it sent your heart aflutter all over again. 

“I love you, too, (Y/N).”

* * *

**One and A Half Years Later**

“Stop fidgeting, or I’m going to stab you with your own bouquet,” Natasha threatened as she finished your makeup and put the final touches on your dress. 

“I’m so damn nervous, Nat,” you mumbled and for the third time that day your breakfast threatened to make a guest appearance. 

“Hey, there’s no reason to be nervous, (Y/N),” she reassured you, rubbing your back gently. “He loves you, you love him. That’s simple,” she said, patting your head gently. 

“Oh god but what if he takes it all back and-” you began frantically, but Natasha cupped a hand over your mouth.

“There aren’t take-backsies on true love, (Y/N). Either you trust him or you don’t,” she said, rolling her eyes.

You let out a sigh through your nose. When she put it like that, it made all your fussing seem as silly as it really was. 

“You good?” she asked, raising a perfectly manicured eyebrow at you. You nodded and she removed your hand. 

“Thanks, Nat. I don’t know what I’d do without you,” you said, giving the woman a genuine smile. You were glad you’d chosen her as your maid of honor.

“Probably go running off in a fit of panic and leave your poor fiance at the altar,” she said, throwing you a knowing smirk. 

“I wouldn’t let her do that,” Wanda said as she poked her head into the room you’d claimed for getting ready. 

“Oh god, how is it looking out there?” you asked her, nervousness returning for completely different reasons.

“We’ve had to turn away about two dozen news crews and what appeared to be half of Asgard, but other than that, it’s great,” she said, beaming at you. “You look gorgeous,” she added, throwing Natasha a covert thumbs up. 

“You doubted my abilities?” Natasha asked, looking scandalized. 

“Never, Natasha,” Wanda said, smiling.

“You two look just as amazing,” you said, smiling at them in their bridesmaids dresses. You’d chosen red with silver accents. Natasha had gone blonde so it wouldn’t clash with her hair, and everyone agreed she rocked it. 

“Well, we can’t have that. Can’t outshine the bride on her wedding day. Maybe we should roll around in a mud puddle or something?” Natasha teased. 

“Don’t you dare. If I don’t kill you, Tony definitely will. He paid for those dresses,” you said, wagging your finger threateningly at her. 

“(Y/N)?” came a voice at the door. 

“What is it, Steve?” you asked hesitantly. 

“We’re about to ready to start when you are,” he said, sounding excited. It was his best friend’s big day, after all.

You took a deep breath and Wanda and Natasha gave you supportive looks. 

“Let’s do this, then,” you said determinedly. 

Wanda and Natasha nodded, exiting the room. You heard music play softly in the distance a few minutes later. The procession had started.

Your door opened and Gabe stood there, dressed to the nines. 

“Ready to go, sister?” he asked, loving smile on his face. He’d be walking you down the aisle and was also a groomsmen. Steve was best man, of course, but you’d insisted your one and only family member be a part of the bridal party. 

You took his arm and he walked you to the closed doors at the back of the church. Even through the heavy wooden doors you could hear the music come to a bridge. 

“I’m glad you’re happy,” Gabe said genuinely, giving you one last smile before the doors opened and the bridal chorus filled the hall. Every face in the church turned to look at you, but you zoned in on the one and only person that mattered in that moment. 

Bucky stood at the alter, seemingly awestruck, bright blue eyes trained on you as you made your way slowly down the aisle. 

In that moment you knew that, come whatever may, you would never regret this decision. 

Bucky swore that the smile you gave him that day was so bright it could light the entire city of New York for ten years.

You swore _his_ could light it for twenty. 

* * *

Later, on the plane ride to your honeymoon destination, you joked about the nightmare you’d had the night before: You’d walked up the aisle but when you’d gotten there, Bucky was nowhere to be seen.

Bucky chuckled and placed a kiss gently on your head. He held your hand and ran his thumb lightly over your wedding ring. The ring he’d put on your finger after saying “I do” just a few hours ago. 

“What, and leave my best girl at the alter? Impossible.“


	11. Drabbles

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Three drabbles from a larger post I did for a follower celebration. Takes place during/after the events of Impossible.

**The night Bucky and Steve got drunk**

“Steve! Steeeeeve!” Bucky hissed from across the room. It was currently 4 am and Steve and Bucky were out causing drunken mischief that the denizens of the base would only discover once the sun had risen. 

“What is it, Buck?” Steve hissed back, temporarily distracted from his mission of turning every piece of [non-fragile] furniture he could find upside-down. 

Bucky held an odd assortment; onions, baking caramel, and popsicle sticks. “I have an idea,” he said, grinning broadly. 

* * *

An hour later they’d made an entire tray of Caramel Onions. No, not delicious caramelized onions. Raw onions disguised as caramel apples. 

Steve gazed at their creation in disgust. “This has to be against some sort of law,” he said, moving to scrub the sink and pots of any evidence. 

“Hey, do you think Nat will try to kill us if she eats one of these?” Bucky asked, throwing a paranoid glance over his shoulder. 

Steve seemed to think about it for a moment. “Probably.”

Bucky shrugged. “Worth it,” he said, daydreaming about Sam or Tony biting deeply into one.

* * *

* * *

**Two years after you and Bucky got married**

The crying woke you up before it did Bucky. You groaned and _whapped_ him in the side, pulling your pillow over your head. 

He woke suddenly, sitting up slightly before he realized there wasn’t danger, only a hungry baby. 

“It’s your turn,” you grumped, voice muffled by the pillow. This was the fourth time that night and you were exhausted, even with you and Bucky taking turns. 

He placed a gentle, sleepy kiss to your shoulder and a second later you felt the bed lift as he got up. You vaguely heard him shuffle out of the bedroom, shutting the door behind him. 

A year ago you’d moved out of the compound. He’d insisted on living in Brooklyn. He always saw it as his home and, well, anywhere he was was where you considered your home to be.

You didn’t find out you were pregnant until a month after you’d moved in. 

Unsurprisingly, everyone was concerned. Your and Bucky’s situations weren’t exactly normal, after all. 

But the pregnancy was normal (although mutant DNA didn’t always make itself known immediately) and Bucky didn’t seem to be suffering any ill effects like Gabe’s past lovers seemed to. When tests confirmed that your DNA hadn’t adversely effected Bucky it felt like a huge weight had been taken off of your shoulders (though it was unclear if he’d even been exposed to enough of it to begin with. You’d both been pretty damn careful). 

Eight and a half months later you’d given birth to a beautiful baby girl. Rebecca Gabriella Barnes. Rebecca for his sister, Gabriella for your brother. She was the spitting image of her father, right down to the steel blue eyes and tufts of dark brown hair. She even had his smile. 

She was the apple of his eye. You occasionally caught him gently singing the song “Isn’t She Lovely” to her when he thought you weren’t around. He was the doting father you knew he’d be. He’d been terrified about it at first but as soon as she was born his hesitation and insecurities about the whole thing vanished and he took on the role of father with pride.

You sighed, groggily getting up and out of bed. You were awake now, whether you liked it or not. You dragged yourself to the nursery, pausing in the doorway to admire your husband and child. 

He held her in his right arm, bottle in his left. The way he stared down at her made your heart melt. The bags under his eyes couldn’t hide the way his eyes shone when he looked at her. 

She loved her papa. She was fascinated by his metal arm and tried to follow him whenever he went. He was even better at getting her back to sleep than you were, though you’d never admit that to him; he’d never let you live it down. 

“I thought you were going back to sleep,” he murmured, glancing up at you. 

“Couldn’t fall back asleep, so I figured I might as well come be with my two favorite people in the world,” you said, smile lighting up your face. He returned it and it was, in that moment, easy to forget both of your pasts and just… enjoy the here and now. 

* * *

* * *

**Forty Years Later**

“You have to,” he whispered.

“No, I can’t do that to you,” you said fiercely, his hand clutched in yours. 

“Doll, we knew everything was going to catch up with me at some point. It’s just a few years earlier than we expected,” he said sadly, brushing your hair out of your face with his metal hand. 

“There are new treatments and-” 

“Doll, take Becca and go. This isn’t gonna be pretty. I don’t want you around to see this,” he said sadly, cupping your cheek with his palm. It was getting wrinkly, veins much more pronounced than they’d been forty years ago. His hair was streaked with grey, receding and balding in some spots. 

You looked the same you did when you met him all those years ago. He always bragged that he was the luckiest man alive; his wife was an eternal beauty. 

You hated it. You wanted to grow old with him. You wanted to enjoy a life with him. A single life. But your DNA wouldn’t allow that, and now he was dying. 

Stage Four Pancreatic Cancer. Not to mention general failing health from all of his years spent as a human popsicle. 

“I’m not leaving you, idiot,” you said, tears in your eyes. “Becca and I are staying right here, where we belong. With you,” you said, glaring at him. 

He chuckled, stroking your cheek with his thumb. The cold metal made you shiver. “Hey, babydoll, don’t cry. You’ve given me a better life than a punk like me deserves. You should be smiling,” he said, melancholy smile on his lips. “Besides, I have a few miles left in the tank, sweetheart. I’m not goin’ anywhere yet.”

You nodded, trying your best to blink back the tears, and failed. He wiped them away carefully, shushing you gently. You finally pulled yourself together enough to speak again.

“Do you need anything, Buck?” you asked, glancing around at the sparse hospital room. 

“You remember that place we went to for our first date?” he asked, grinning at the memory. You smiled, too. 

“Really? A double cheese burger from Zachariah’s?” you asked, knowing exactly what he was referring to. 

“Please?” he asked, batting his eyelashes unfairly at you. 

You groaned. “With an order of fries?” 

He nodded. “You’re the best, (Y/N),” he said happily. He surprised you by still having enough strength to pull you in for a messy kiss. 

“Yeah, yeah,” you muttered dismissively, though you had a wide smile on your face. “Be back in a bit. Don’t go dying on me while I’m gone, alright?” your said, joking tone not quite enough to hide the anxiety underneath. 

He noticed, but didn’t comment. He merely nodded, “Wouldn’t dream of it, Doll.”

He leaned back against the pillow, frown returning once you were out of sight. 

He waited a moment before he spoke up. “I know you’re out there,” he said bluntly. 

Gabe poked his head in, smiling guiltily. “You’d think I’d be able to sneak up on you after all these years,” he said coyly. 

“It’s exactly because I’ve known you all these years that you can’t, Gabe,” Bucky said tiredly. 

“Not lookin’ so hot there, brother,” Gabe commented, moving to Bucky’s side. “You know if my sister knew I was here right now she’d probably try to kill me,” he said conversationally. 

“This obviously isn’t a social call, Gabe, or you’d have brought alcohol. What are you doin’ here?” Bucky asked, raising an eyebrow at the older man. Like you, he hadn’t aged a day since they’d met. 

He grinned like the cheshire cat. “You know me so well,” he said, moving to stand beside the bed. 

“Gabe, I swear to god, out with it-” whatever Bucky had been about to say was cut off by Gabe’s vicious blow to Bucky’s temple. 

Bucky was knocked unconscious immediately. “Sorry, bro. That’s gonna hurt when you wake up, though I bet it pales in comparison to stage four cancer and organ failure,” he said, rubbing his knuckles tenderly. “But I know if you were awake you’d try to stop me,” he said, clenching his jaw as he took out four syringes: two were full of blood- yours and Rebecca’s-, one full of a mystery blue concoction and the last was empty. He carefully tapped one of his own veins, filling the last syringe completely, and sighed wearily.

“If the wonder twin mojo, super spawn DNA, and super soldier DNA combined aren’t enough to save you, nothing is. I know these doctors sure as hell can’t save you. I taught half of them myself,” he said, talking to himself mostly as a force of habit. Without any preamble he injected all four syringes into Bucky’s IV. He watched with grim fascination as the purple mixture traveled down the plastic tube and entered Bucky’s bloodstream. 

“She can’t lose you, bud. It’ll kill her,” Gabe muttered as he removed the needles and threw them in the hazardous materials waste bin. “Fight, you bastard. You’re good at that,” he said, glaring at Bucky’s unconscious form. “Live.” He spun on his heels, leaving the room as quickly as he’d come. No matter the outcome, he’d likely made enemies of you and Bucky for life. He needed to get far away, and fast.

* * *

Gabe was long gone by the time you returned. You’d picked Becca up from her job; it’d been another late day in the office for her, but she was excited to see her dad. 

You stuck your head in the door, smile on your face as you spoke. “Hey, Buck. Look who’s here to see you-” 

Your smile slid straight off your face at the sight before you. The food you’d been carrying crashed to the ground, drinks splashing everywhere and you clapped a hand over your mouth to hold back the scream in your throat.

“Mom? What’s wr-” Rebecca froze as soon as she peeked around the corner. “Dad…?” she said, not believing her eyes. “Dad!” she yelled.

Bucky stood in the center of the hospital room, younger, even, than the day you’d met him. This was what Bucky looked like in his prime, before the war took everything from him. The metal arm was still there, though. 

You moved before she did, throwing yourself bodily into his arms. He caught you easily, lifted you up, and spun you around as though you weighed nothing. He laughed heartily and you felt tears prickle in your eyes, but for the first time in weeks they were happy tears.

Becca nearly sent the both of you toppling to the ground as she threw herself at you, arms wrapped around you both. She had her dad’s super strength and durability and her mom’s immortality. She was the gem of the Barnes household.

You had a million and one questions for him, but that was for another time. Now, you savored the moment, thinking that, perhaps, you wouldn’t have to say goodbye to your heart.


End file.
